Lucky I'm bipolar (or I'd be angry all the time)

Just a quick thought...

2007-04-04T11:41:00.000-05:00

I read an article today that Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton have collectively raised over 50 million dollars in the first three months of their presidential campaigns.

Republican runner Mitt Romney pulled in 23 million, Guiliani is somewhere in the 15 range and John McCain is close to that.

Ahh, let's keep it easy...basically these big name Presidential hopefuls have pulled in 100 million dollars to fund their run at the white house.

Seems like if we could just get all the these people that are giving money to donate it to Health Care, Education, Social Security, Homeland Security, etc.... instead of giving it to the people who just want to talk about it...we'd all be a lot better off.

Just a thought.

The Ankle

2007-03-13T20:42:00.000-05:00

I'm a little screwed up sometimes....

Now that we've got that out of the way, let me tell you all a story.

Since as far back as I can remember I've always considered myself to have a pretty high pain tolerance. Now I'm not one of those crazy guys that goes out trying to get his ass kicked every weekend just to prove how tough he is. The way I see it, you shouldn't expend that much energy unless you wrassling with a chica, and getting your nose dirty shouldn't involve concrete or asphalt.

I blame this on my older brother...you see we didn't always have or accept the father figures in our lives. Now that's our business, but what is your business is that a lot of times, whether he knew it or not, he was a male authority figure in my life...someone I looked up to...someone that I tried to be like. One of the things that my brother would always tell me, was that I had to be tough...take the pain...quit crying...don't' tell mom...wait a minute...and its something that has stuck with me....it has stuck to the point that I actually have a fear of going to the doctor and him telling me that nothing is wrong. Crazy heh?

So anyway, about 8 years ago I jumped off a porch and rolled my ankle pretty bad. Like I said, I think I'm a pretty tough guy,and more importantly I evidently want other people to think I'm a pretty tough guy, so I got up and walked it off. It might have helped that I was drunker than nine Indians on pay day. So I get up, walk it off, walk around, walk all night and eventually end up at home...the next morning I wake up and think that Cathy Bates must have taken a sledge to my ankle. It was huge, purple, and hurt like a sonofabeech. Well, about 6 weeks later I decided that I might need to go to the Doctor. It was still pretty sore, and swollen, and purple...So I go and he takes some x-rays and he tells me basically that he thinks I broke a small bone or two in my ankle, but they have since started to heal to some extent. He then tells me that I have two choices...he can re break the ankle, or he can give me some medicine to help the swelling and that it'll probably bother me when I'm older. So I ask the first questions that pops in my head, "how would you re break it?"

"with a hammer" he replies

"Fuck You" I think out loud.

Besides that, he says that it'll bother me when I'm older and to the 20 year old me that has to be like 40 0r 50 or older.

So here I sit 8 years later.

My ankle has been bothering me off and on for the last year or so. Sometimes I can function as normal, and sometimes it hurts so bad I can't walk. A few weeks ago I was walking through our yard at work...nobody around, nothing around, nowhere to go...and my ankle hurts so bad I can't walk. I was just standing there...thinking of crawling...but refusing to because I have to take the pain. I hobbled in the office and finally decide to call the doc.

Well I go to the Doctor and he looks at my foot and goes, "yeah, ummm humm...and you say it hurts where...and when...and does it hurt if I push here...." and I can tell this dude doesn't have a clue what's going on inside me foot...but he does write me a order to go get x-rays which entitles me to be covered by my insurance.

So I go to the X-ray...and then the old fear hits me. What if there is nothing wrong? What if I'm just a big ole puss? (you fuckers that call yourselves my friends better not comment on that) What if they find that its all in my head? Then wouldn't you freaking know...I get a call from the Doc saying they couldn't see anything on the X-ray..."Well, fuck me...I am a puss"...then he tells me he wants to do a MRI because he feels it'll show what's bothering me. I'm thinking he just wants to get as much money as he can before he tells me I'm a puss.

Well, I get the MRI...partly because I just wanna see what its like...and partly because I'm hoping there is something wrong with me (crazy I tell Ya)

Let's shorten the story...got the MRI results back...WOO HOO...I've got fluid in the joints, fluid in the tendon sheathing (did you know you had tendon sheathing?) damage to some bone, tears on something or other...and best of all...I wasn't just making it up...

Crap, I wasn't just making it up...and evidently 28 is old (according to the Doc)

So I'm going to the some other doctor tomorrow...see what the next step is (no pun intended there) and where I need to go...I'll let you know

by the way...for those of you who know the other place I write stuff...well there is some other stuff there.

until next time....

Its Raining

2007-03-13T19:11:00.000-05:00

and has been since Sunday...

but Monday there was a break in the rain for most of the daytime and it was beautiful outside. I went to lunch at a place here in San Marcos with a couple guys from work and one smokin' hot chick. I'd love to go into detail about the place and all...it has a very relaxing outside patio, very good food, kinda slow service...

anyway, I guess something that happened that day kinda sparked this little thing inside me...and now that I'm completely cooped up I have no choice but to just get it out.

So I'm ordering my food, and the waiter asks me if I want the conservative portion or the more liberal portion. He asks me this in a way where he's trying to sell me the more liberal portion, although I may just be reading way too much into this. I don't know why he doesn't ask me if I want the lunch portion or the dinner portion (which is the way it reads on the menu) and why I have to take so much notice in it. Maybe it's because he's just kind of a weird dude with long hair and looks like he's a "very liberal" person...ahh I shouldn't be so stereotypical...I mean I have short hair and drive a ford truck, but I consider myself a little more liberal than most. Don't get me wrong, I don't smoke pot or hug trees (well, not since the late 90's)....crap, I gotta stop.

Back to the point...so I go with the "conservative" portion because normally the lunch portion is more than enough to tide you over 'til 6 or so and its also cheaper and I'm a cheap bastard. Well, I don't know if Scraggly McWaiter thinks that I'm some Right-Wing Conservative nutball and wants to punish me, or if the restaurant just ran out of chicken, but the the conservative portion was a little on the inadequate size. They gave me this piece of chicken breast (piece I tell ya) that looked more like a chicken McNugget with some stuff on top of it and a then a plate filled with creamed corn. I don't know if any of you have ever heard my stance on corn, but you've all eaten it, you've all seen where it ends up....

Now, I'm eating my McNugget and can't keep thinking about my waiter's question of "conservative" or "more liberal" and thinking that I want to ask him if I could have a little more conservative helping of corn and a more reasonable portion of fucking chicken...but I'm a pretty laid back guy. I just let things go. Plus I've seen that movie "Waiting" and there ain't no way in hell I'm sending something back. Lucky for me, aforementioned hot chick decided to get a chicken fried steak that's about as big as the plate and I got to eat a good sized piece of that.

Rambling.

So anyway, now that I've set up my dining experience to become a political metaphor...let me get on with it.

Beside the fact that the next election and all the campaigning is just around the corner, it seems that politics has made its way to almost every possible avenue it can. Debates and Deliberations are not just tucked away on CNN and Fox News at night...they are on all day everyday...They've invaded MTV, CMT, the Cartoon Network and the Comedy Channel. Stephen Colbert has become a pop-icon because of this movement. He first had a small part on the Daily Show, and soon became the biggest thing in pop political culture with the Colbert Report. This was a parody, a knock on political analysts...but don't think its all fun and games...because the politics are everywhere.

The reason...because there is a problem. If all was well in White House Land, then we'd see some skits on SNL now and again...see which actor can do the best imitation of the Pres. This has been going on for years...its fun to play off of characters in the public eye, no matter what their role, but when it becomes this big its because there's too much ammunition to use...too many incidents to replay....too much evidence.

Its a simple truth that people are more apt to report on something wrong than something right...people register more complaints than compliments...its just that way.

So now we find ourselves in the midst of a political rebellion. We're pointing out everything wrong we can find. It's not just left verses right...there is more discord among parties than their has been in a long time. The days of jumping on the party train, and riding it to the primaries are over. Democrats and Republicans alike are afraid to be categorized as "that kind of Democrat" or "this kind of Republican" War, abortion, immigration, welfare reform, social security...we're coming to a point where we can't win, and we can't afford to lose...

Let me just stop and say that I support American Troops. Whether they are marching down the streets of Baghdad or Baltimore, I wholeheartedly support them. These are American men and women who are giving their lives so that you may enjoy yours. I sit here and type this rambling and sip on a beer because people gave their life for me. Did you know that their are countries on this planet where it is illegal to drink alcohol at any age? I would never support anyone who would, by their actions as a lawmaker, turn their backs on American troops in any country in any situation. So be careful what you ask for when you ask for the war to be over...I'm not saying its right...I'm saying you have to do what's right for right now and for the people who are directly involved.

The thing here, is that its all fucked up. Sorry to sugar coat it...and there are isn't anyone with answers. It's easy to listen to someone say that you should choose them to lead because they aren't like that last leader. That's great, but where are you going to take me from here? Okay, that's where you want to take me, but how are we going to get there? The problem with most liberals is that they are quick to point out problems, but never come up with any solutions...that's right...I said it...which side am I on anyway?

And all I really wish is that I had just ordered my own damn chicken friend steak...

son...of...a....

2007-02-26T19:22:00.000-06:00

Man I hate computers sometime...I had this nice thing all written out...it was good...insightful...full or thought provoking sentiments and imminent wisdom...and then it was just all gone....

Fucking computers!

Maybe someday it'll all come back...but until then let me tell you a little story.

About a month and a half ago or so...I was bumbling around e-bay...I decided that I want a laptop and wanted to see what a refurbished one was going for. $250...what a deal...so I dropped a bid one it. I figured it'd go for much more and didn't really think twice about it. 30 minutes later I get an e-mail telling me "Congratulations! You're the big winner"

Ahh Hell

So now I gotta pay $250 (which is still a heck of a deal) for this laptop that I don't even really know if it works or not. I mean, that's money for drinking (I can always go a few days without eating to save a buck or two) and what if this thing is a stone age p.o.s.?

Well, it came in and turns out its been a heck of a deal...

BUT

I've had to reteach myself how to type. You see the little pad that takes the place of the mouse is right about where the base of my thumbs hit the computer. There's been a time or two when something I was typing just disappeared...all thanks to my thumbs.

This hasn't been too much of a problem since I'm a pretty good typer (typist, typeeze...) and am what some people would call a natural...yeah that's right....a natural. The first typing test I ever took, back at good ole ACHS, I typed 30 words a minute. This is like 2 minutes (weeks maybe) into the class. Now I'm up close to 95, maybe a 100, if you don't count mistakes and/or times I erased my whole fucking blog. I'm just that good...and some may say that this isn't very manly, and I say "Yeah, so how many words a minute can you type big man?"

"I've got cats too bitch! You want some...come and get it"

Because I'm secure with my masculinity and I type fast...and I have cats (go ahead, click the link)...and I'm not doing a whole lot for myself right now.

So where was I?

Anyway, the new computer is great and wireless and does have a pretty cool program for watching DVDs and listening to music...it was however very bare when it came to other applications. There is no word processing program, which is why I have to write things like this online, and therefore sometimes lose them completely. I've been meaning to get a good word processor, but it turns out that I'm also very good at procrastination.

Procrastination is like Masturbation...it sounds like a good idea at the time, but in the end you're really just fucking yourself.

So here I sit typing and hoping that I don't erase all I've done...and thinking about procrastinating...

I think I'm starting to feel better....maybe later I'll rework the thing I erased...stupid f'in computer.

Election Day

2006-11-07T12:10:00.000-06:00

Go Vote! Or Don't...

All this political talk has taken me back to my first time voting...the first person I voted for??? Slick Willie...That's right...my first ever vote...the first contribution to the political process I ever made was for Wild Bill...

Who was your first???? Ohh, its sounds so Nasty!!!

F.O.A.D.

2006-10-19T20:23:00.000-05:00

NO, I don't do this religiously on Thursday.

Hell, I don't do anything religiously.

But today, oh today...I must tell a group of people to Fuck Off And Die.

The shitholers!

What are shitholers....there the people that turn public bathrooms into shitholes.

My company has about 25 or so employees, and two bathrooms. One strictly for women (well, most of the time) and one unisex bathroom. Hey, I'm from Texas...we know how to treat our women. Anyway, none of the people at my workplace would want to make the bathroom look like a shithole...we work there all day, every day...If you piss on the seat, you may be the next person that has a sit down there...besides that...its retail...and like it or not...every part of that store reflects on our image. I don't want to be known as, Michael Wren - the guy that works down at that place where the bathroom is a shithole!

But everyday I go in there...to sit, or stand, or just wash my hands...and every fucking day someone has left behind a little mention of themselves...or they've missed the urinal and somehow hit the floor and wall. There are shit stains on the seat, where they backed their ass up a little too far...and then the nastiest thing I've ever seen...a big fucking nasty green and brown loogey stuck to the wall opposite the toilet. That means someone was sitting there taking a dump (probably didn't flush) and hocked a sticker right across the room...that's fucking gross...and these people are allowed in public...and I hope they all fuck off and die.

And me and my fellow co-workers, because we care about our image and our sales, we clean this shit...and I do mean shit...we clean it up and hope that no one has seen it. I wish I had a list of all these bastards...I sneak into their houses and shit under their pillows....and then tell them very nicely, "Fuck Off And Die!"

Well, I feel better now...if I can just get my blog back in order...but I've got to go do something else real quick...thanks to my buddy for helping me out...you're the best!

Tags: Foad Thursday,Public Restrooms,

NOOOOOOO!!!!

2006-10-16T19:07:00.000-05:00

Shit!!!

I was playing around with different templates and I lost everything!!! My blogroll...my links...all gone...what was I thinking?

I hate computers...I don't feel real good right now...I may never make it right...may never!!!

Off With Their Ads!!!

2006-10-11T13:45:00.000-05:00

You know, I don't know why I started blogging...and then the whole adsense thing came up and you could "make money" by blogging and I added that stuff and although there are people who have been very successful with these programs, and I was not. Mainly because I write about a lot of pointless shit, and some other stuff...

Anyway, I took 'em off...and I did so hoping to turn this blog into what I think I really want it to be.

There is no false pretenses here, I'm not going in incognito...My name is really Michael Fucking Wren and these are all really my thoughts and opinions...actually, you probably could call me Michael Craving...but that's beside the point. I want not only to share my own point of view (no matter how crazy it might be) but also to poll the opinion of other people. I want comments, and I can't figure out how to get them...so maybe by cutting all the crap out...dropping the bullshit and laying it out there...maybe that's the trick

You know, I normally sign up for battle of the blogs on BE when I post something new...I don't do it to win...its not like I'm gambling away my rent money...I do it to get read. But you know, sometimes I enter a blog into three...maybe four challenges...and never get a post. I won a few 50 crediters the other day, and so I decided to do one for 100 just to see what happened...it was over in like 5 minutes. Which means 15 people "viewed" my blog, not one commented, and probably half of them didn't even read past the first few lines.

What a crock of shit...I've said it before...vote for them...but come back and read my blog!

I don't want to give up on my "If I were President" game...its a couple of posts down...go read it and then do some commenting...I can't believe no one has commented on the inaugural Presidential BJ...geez...There are blogs that I visit occasionally that have people who should eat this up...The Watchlist...Hamburger...where are you guys???

So, I leave you with this last question...don't be scared to leave an answer...I'm going to start easy...no politics...no religion...If you could go back and hang out with anyone in history...who would it be?

Tags: adsense,google ads, Battle of the Blogs,Michael Wren

Dangit!!!

2006-10-10T13:02:00.000-05:00

People are reading the blog, or atleast visiting...but no one is commenting...Don't be scared...you don't necessarily have to be serious...have some fun!!!

the next post down is for commenting...DON'T BE SCARED.

Let's play a game!

2006-10-09T23:32:00.000-05:00

Called, "If I were President"

We've all done it...whether it be speaking unrationally and without considering consequences "I'd blow them off the fucking map..." or taking all things into consideration, "I'd spend less money on defense and counterterrorism, annd more on other domestic issues..." at one time or another we've all told someone what we'd do if we were President.

So I'd like to hear a few now...we've got some great topics.

What would you do with North Korea?

How would you handle the Foley scandal, and the effect its having on the GOP?

What is your plan to admirably end the war in the middle east so that we might keep our honor and dignity, but also show strength and fortitude?

If you threw a hellacious Presidential party at your ranch in Crawford, who would you invite?

I wish someone would play along...no one answered my earlier question...so I'll post it one more time...Who do you think was the first President to get a blow job in the White House, by someone other than his wife?

Once I get some responses, I'll answer my own questions.

a little tag

2006-10-04T11:12:00.000-05:00

this is a little extra note to yesterday's post...

Maybe I should save this for FOAD Thursday...but hey...

OH Mr. Foley...

So now the ex-legislator (well, his lawyer)is telling the world that he is gay...NO Shit?! Because bounds of straight men sexually solicit underage boys...He is also claiming that he was molested by a clergyman when he was a teenager...Don't Care...I understand that there is much drama from adolescent assaults, but this is too commonly used as an excuse. He also claims that all his "mishaps" occurred while he was under the influence of alcohol...Bull Shit!...and he already boned that excuse. Seems there were a few instances where he was communicating with a boy, while he was in session...he claims he has never been under the influence while at work...but never had contact with a Page while sober...so Mr. Foley now finds himself somewhere up stream and seems to has lost his paddle.

If I were a member of the gay community, I would be very upset with the "admission" because whether you are heterosexual or homosexual, there still is no excuse for a grown man or woman to sexually solicit a minor. It almost seems if he's saying, "I'm gay and that is the reason I acted the way I did" Which is not right!

Also, I'm not saying that in my daily routine I don't see a girl that I see "attractive" and then realize that she's a little too young for me...its happened...these damn girls are growing up fast!!! but what I don't do is try to make contact with them...or ask them if I make them horny!

And, as a member of the Alcoholic community, I do not agree with him making us drunks look bad...I often see young girls in public when I've had a few...and I still don't ask them if I make them horny!

I don't know why I can't get over this deal...I think because its just more proof to my theory that everyone in office is a heinous villain...they don't always start that way...but there's something in the water (or evidently the Cognac) up there that makes them turn that way...and we elect these people!

Oh Well...

Tags: Mark Foley,Gay/Lesbian, Alcoholics,

Stuff

2006-10-03T19:01:00.000-05:00

So its time for a good ole fashioned rant...It's been a while

First...our country is fucked up! Our congressmen are playing whip the wire with their underage male pages, and then they'll give themselves a raise for it next time they get a chance. I heard someone say that I shouldn't let one bad apple ruin the whole bunch...but anyone who thinks there is just one bad apple in Washington/Austin/Hays Co. or whatever part of the world you live in, also probably thinks that Hillary Clinton should be the next President (did that make sense? Sure it did)

Come on Folks!

Mark Foley isn't the first male politician to have sexual contact with a male page...he may just be the first one to be caught and publicly exposed. Gary Condit wasn't the first politician to make a young girl disappear and Wild Bill probably wasn't the first President to get a blow job in the Oval Office.

I think back to my childhood, or I guess my teen years, when I was always doing something "bad" and by God always getting caught. How did my mother know...what was I doing wrong? My older brother seemed to get away with murder, and here I was getting caught for everything! Well, not everything...it may have just been the law of averages! I realized something a few years ago...it wasn't that I was not as sneaky or sly as my brother, but my mother was smarter than she was 7 years prior. She had seen it all before, and I wasn't coming out with any original material. There's few things to do in a small Texas town...play football, drink beer, and be in the back seat of the car on Saturday night. (ha ha, my first car was a two seater...what was I thinking!!!) Mix in a little mud running, cow tipping, house wrapping, water tower climbing, school jumping (a whole other story), back roading, and skinny dipping and you've got a hell of a good raisin'. Not very original...it all goes on still today...but hey, its a good time. Anyway, the point being...I wasn't doing more or less than my brother, but my mother was educated in a boy's ways, and therefore was more apt to catch the wild bunch.

You get where I went with that one? The media is always looking for the bigger story and finding more means to do so...the Democrats are hungry to regain their control of the legislation...the pages are tired of getting cornholed...and more people are getting caught. Washington is a dirty place...I'm going to go wash my hands just typing about it.

Speaking of legislation...for those of you who play poker or do other gaming online, you probably know about this last weeks law which now makes online gambling illegal...fine...they made it illegal...and snuck it in on the Port Security Act. Basically the mob got pissed because they weren't making the money from online gambling, so they decided that no one should get the money from online gambling...the thought is that those who are addicted to gambling will be looking for bookies or driving to casinos. So, I can no longer lose my paycheck at sportsbook.com, but I could find some guy who will break my fucking fingers when I can't pay him...atleast at sportsbook or party poker it was all prepaid and no one was getting attitude adjustments. My thoughts...if you want to make something illegal, step up and take the law before the people...don't weasel it in. If it was really a major concern, it would be at the top of the list...not a footnote...but that is how the bastards get a raise every year...so they are pretty good at what they do.

I missed blogging about Steve Irwin...dangit...I wasn't a Croc Hunter fanatic, but he was a good man, with a love for nature, and a crazy way of bringing it to the couch potatoes of the world...hats off to a man that died doing what he loved.

I sometimes try not to offend...but there are some things that just finally peck away, and peck away, and peck away...

I'm not sure anymore what I feel about this "war" that we are involved in. I've said before that I thought it was right to go to war, but not so right to still be in war. My thoughts are that the problem is with all this politically correct, and media coverage, and let's try to make this whole thing seem not that violent...bullshit! People are dying and that is violent and sometimes that is what has to happen to resolve a situation. I think back to my athletic days...coaches always preached about kicking a dying dog until it was dead (small town remember). See, if you let a smaller, weaker, lesser opponent stay in a fight with you for too long...he starts getting more courage, more adrenaline, more cunning and he then can beat you, but if you go in and just kick some fucking ass...lay down the law...and drop the hammer (no I don't think we should have erased them from the map...not a trend we need to lead) this war would have been over years ago.

So with that being said...I'm tired of hearing about the President and his campaign sending innocent men and women to die. Yes, its true that troops are dying, and that a lot of them are innocent...but they are also doing a job that they signed up to do and it is a job that comes with risks. There has not been a draft in this war...this isn't Vietnam all over again (yet) and no one that has been killed was forced to join the army...or at least not by the army. Underwater welding is one of the most dangerous jobs there is, and these welders are well paid because of it. If an employer were to send an welder down several hundred feet and ask him to weld something, and there is a problem and that welder loses his life...is it the boss man's fault? Should a person who chooses a high risk profession, knowing those risks, be able to blame their losses on another man? Soldiers in the armed forces are paid and trained to serve their country, protect their country, and sometimes die for their country...I'm not saying that I don't mourn with the families of fallen soldiers...I do...I salute them...I encourage them...and I am indebted to them for the freedoms and liberties that I have today. Even if it is being besmirched and defiled by the evil bastards that we elect every couple of years. What I'm saying is innocent men and women are not being sent to their death by the administration...men and women are dying, doing their job, in a ill-favored work environment. Yeah, I know that might piss you off.

Man I need to quit! I'm off to play music...let me know what you think...

Here's the question of the day....who do you think was the first President to get a blow job, by someone other than his wife, in the White House???

Tags: Mark Foley,Gary Condit, Wild Bill, Hillary Clinton, Port Security Act,Steve Irwin, sportsbook, party poker, Presidental fornication,

It makes sense

2006-09-12T15:06:00.000-05:00

I really don't know where this came from...I didn't write it. I got it via e-mail today, but there was no true source.

I'm kind of a fence rider on this whole immigration thing...but like I said...it makes sense.

Let's say I break into your house

Recently large demonstrations have taken place across the country
protesting the fact that Congress is finally addressing the issue of
illegal immigration. Certain people are angry that the US might
protect its own borders, might make it harder to sneak into this country
and, once here, to stay indefinitely. Let me see if I correctly understand
the thinking behind these protests.

Let's say I break into your house. Let's say that when you discover
me in your house, you insist that I leave. But I say, "I've made all the
beds and washed the dishes and did the laundry and swept the floors; I've
done all the things you don't like to do. I'm hard-working and honest
(except for when I broke into your house).

According to the protesters, not only must you let me stay, you must
add me to your family's insurance plan, educate my kids, and provide
other benefits to me and to my family (my husband will do your yard work
because he too is hard-working and honest, except for that breaking in part).

If you try to call the police or force me out, I will call my friends
who will picket your house carrying signs that proclaim my right to be there.

It's only fair, after all, because you have a nicer house than I do,
and I'm just trying to better myself. I'm hard-working and honest, um,
except for well, you know.

And what a deal it is for me!! I live in your house, contributing
only a fraction of the cost of my keep, and there is nothing you can do
about it without being accused of selfishness, prejudice and being an
anti-housebreaker. Oh yeah, and I want you to learn my language
so you can communicate with me.

so there you have it...what'd you think?

Tags: immigration

Valuable Tax Information

2006-09-05T15:22:00.000-05:00

Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with

Let me first say that this information came from my sister, the CPA, I only share this with you as an action of good will!

Telephone Tax Refund Questions and Answers

What is the telephone tax refund?

The telephone tax refund is a one-time payment available on your 2006 federal income tax return, designed to refund previously collected long-distance federal excise taxes. It is available to anyone who paid long-distance taxes on landline, cell phone or Voice over Internet Protocol (VoIP) service.

Why is the government refunding these taxes?

Several recent federal court decisions have held that the tax does not apply to long-distance service as it is billed today. The IRS is following these decisions and refunding the portion of the tax charged on long-distance calls. The IRS is also refunding taxes collected on telephone service under plans that do not differentiate between long distance and local calls.

The telephone tax continues to apply to local-only service, and the IRS is not refunding taxes charged on local-only service.

The IRS will refund to you the taxes on long-distance service billed to you for the period after Feb 28, 2003 and before Aug 1, 2006. Taxpayers should request this refund next year when they file their 2006 tax returns.

How do I get the telephone tax refund?

In general, anyone who paid the long-distance telephone tax will get the refund on their 2006 federal income tax return. This includes individuals, businesses and nonprofit organizations. The 2006 return is usually filed during 2007.

The IRS is making it easier for taxpayers by offering a standard refund amount between $30 and $60, so they don’t need to gather old phone bills. Taxpayers who choose the standard amount will only need to fill out one line on their tax returns. The standard amount is based on actual telephone usage data and the amount applicable to a family or other household reflects the long-distance phone tax paid by similarly sized families or households. Using this amount is the easiest way for taxpayers to get their refunds and avoid gathering 41 months of old phone records.

Businesses and nonprofits must fill out the new Form 8913 and base their refund requests on the actual amount of tax they paid. The IRS is considering an estimation method that businesses and nonprofits could use for figuring the tax paid and is asking for public suggestions on potential methodologies that are both accurate and relatively easy for taxpayers to use. Comments should be e-mailed to Telephone.Tax@irs.gov and must be received by Sept. 15, 2006.

Who is eligible to request the telephone tax refund?

In general, any individual, business or nonprofit organization that paid long-distance tax for service billed after Feb 28, 2003 and before Aug 1, 2006 is eligible to request the refund.

What is the standard amount?

Individual taxpayers can take a standard amount from $30 to $60 based on the number of exemptions claimed on their tax return. For those claiming:

• one exemption, the standard refund amount is: $30
• two exemptions, the standard refund amount is: $40
• three exemptions, the standard refund amount is: $50
• four exemptions or more, the standard refund amount is: $60

The instructions to the 2006 1040 tax forms will provide more information on how to determine the correct number of exemptions. (Because the term, “exemptions” does not appear on Form 1040EZ, people who fill out this form should follow the instructions carefully.)

The standard amount is based on actual telephone usage data, and the amount applicable to a family or other household reflects the long-distance phone tax paid by similarly sized families or households. Using this amount is the easiest way for taxpayers to get their refund and avoid gathering 41 months of old phone records.

What forms do I file to request the refund?

For many individual taxpayers who want to take the standard amount, there are no additional forms to file, and they only need to fill out one additional line on their regular income-tax return.

Individuals choosing the standard amount can simply fill in the amount on Form 1040, Form 1040A, Form 1040NR or Form 1040EZ. People who don’t need to file a return can use a new, simple form (Form 1040EZ-T) to choose the standard amount.

Taking the standard amount is optional. It is also the easiest way to get a refund. A married couple filing a joint return with two dependent children, for example, will be eligible for the maximum standard amount of $60.

Individuals who decide not to use the standard amount must figure their refund using the actual amount of tax they paid. To choose this option, taxpayers can fill out Form 8913 and attach it to their regular income-tax returns.

The standard amount is not available to businesses and nonprofits. Accordingly, they must fill out Form 8913 and base their refund requests on the actual amount of tax they paid. Businesses should attach this form to the income-tax returns they normally file -- Form 1120, Form 1120S, Form 1065 or Form 1041. Nonprofits, including churches, charities and other tax-exempt organizations, attach it to Form 990-T. The IRS is considering an estimation method businesses and nonprofits can use for figuring out the amounts to be included on Form 8913.

How did the government come up with the standard amounts?

Telephone industry and IRS data were used to determine the refundable standard amounts. Telephone industry data showed that long distance spending correlated directly with the number of persons in a household; therefore, a scaled refund structure was selected based on the number of exemptions claimed on the tax return.

Can I e-file to get this refund?

Yes. Virtually anyone who files an individual return qualifies for electronic filing, and the telephone tax refund is one of many tax benefits that can be reported on an e-filed return. Whether you file electronically or on paper, you can get your refund even faster by having it deposited directly into your checking or savings account.

I don’t have to file an income-tax return. How do I get the telephone tax refund?

For those who do not otherwise have to file a tax return, there is a new form (1040EZ-T), which can be used to get this refund.

Do internet long-distance plans qualify for the refund?

Yes. If you paid the federal excise tax on your long-distance internet plan, you can request the telephone tax refund.

Why do I only get a refund for the past few years?

Under the applicable statute of limitations in the Internal Revenue Code, the IRS is generally not permitted to refund taxes that were paid more than three years before the date on which the refund program was announced. Accordingly, the telephone tax refund is available for long-distance taxes billed after Feb. 28, 2003, and before Aug. 1, 2006.

How do I determine how much federal excise tax I have paid on my long-distance service?

Taxpayers who choose to base their refund requests on the actual amount of tax paid should review their phone bills since Feb. 28, 2003. Taxes paid on local-only service are not eligible for the refund. In general, federal excise taxes paid on other types of service qualify. Federal access charges and state or local taxes and charges are not eligible for the refund.

On the other hand, taxpayers who choose the standard amount need not determine the amount of tax they paid. The standard amount is based on actual telephone usage data, and the amount applicable to a family or other household reflects the long-distance phone tax paid by similarly sized families or households. Using this amount is the easiest way for taxpayers to get their refund and avoid gathering 41 months of old phone records.

What if I don’t know whether I paid this long-distance tax and I don’t have my phone bills?

To get the telephone tax refund, you must have paid the tax. If you don’t have your telephone bills, the only way to be sure if you paid the tax for long distance is to check with your service provider.

Who do I call?

Instructions for requesting this refund will be included with your tax forms and at irs.gov. Therefore, most people will not need to call the IRS. If you decide to figure the actual amount and need to obtain copies of your phone bills, you should contact your phone service provider. Telephone companies may charge for copies of past bills.

What do I have to do now?

In most cases, nothing. Taxpayers will request this refund on their 2006 return. Accordingly, the IRS will begin accepting refund requests in January 2007.

The only decision you have to make is whether to use the standard amount or the amount of tax you actually paid. To take the standard amount, you don’t need to do anything now. You can figure it when you fill out your 2006 return.

If you are considering using the actual expense method, you may want to start gathering your phone bills since Feb. 28, 2003. As with any other line item on your return, starting early and keeping good records always makes the tax-preparation process easier.

Will the IRS pay interest on the refunded telephone tax?

The standard amount includes interest. The IRS will issue guidance later this year relating to the payment of interest where the actual expense method is used.

How do I decide if it’s better for me to use the actual or take the standard amount?

You can use whichever method gives you the larger refund. The standard amount is based on actual telephone usage data and the amount applicable to a family or other household reflects the long-distance phone tax paid by similarly sized families or households. Using this amount is the easiest way for taxpayers to get their refund and avoid gathering 41 months of old phone records.

Do I have to itemize to claim this refund?

No. Because this is a refund of taxes previously paid, it does not matter whether you itemize or take the standard deduction.

Will I get a separate check?

No. The telephone tax refund will be treated as a one-time payment on your 2006 return. Accordingly, it will reduce the amount you owe on your return or increase the amount of your refund.

What is the total amount the government expects to refund?

Economists at the U.S. Department of the Treasury estimate the amount refunded to individuals will be about $10 billion.

Tags: telephone tax refund

battle of the blogs

2006-08-25T00:30:00.000-05:00

vote for the other guy, but read my previous post and answer the questions!!!

So here we go...

2006-08-24T18:12:00.000-05:00

finally...

So I like to visit sites like this one and check out all the cool optical illusions. I recently put one on my desk top with circles that appear to move, even though they are not moving. Supposedly the more stress you have, the faster the circles move. Don't know if I'm sold on this or not, but when I asked a fellow worker to look and tell me how fast his were moving he illustrated with his finger at the turn. Well, my circles were running circles around his circles. So, am I super stressed? Or, is it just simply that I see things different than him....OR, is it that I heard the story about stress and speed and made myself believe the circles were moving faster. The mind is a powerful, yet very weak thing. I can't get you out of my head!!!

TGIT...Yes, I love Thursday...be sure to check out Jane and all the other FOAD folks.

Do any of you believe in karma? Do you think that its possible that everything you've done up to this point might effect what happens to you tomorrow? Karma is basically you reaping what you've sewn...so would it be so, if I were to be the same way to people for years, that it would only make sense it would happen to me? Do you believe in Luck? Do you believe in fate? Destiny? Is it wrong to believe in any of this? I see something now that looks a lot like karma...or would karma just be my way of explaining something that just wasn't meant to be? And is anything really meant to be? If things are already predetermined, than why can't you just set life on cruise control and let them come to you? If things are predetermined, who predetermines them and why do they choose some to succeed and some to fail?

Why is it not raining?

Impeach Bush? I read blogs and cards and letters with these words on it. I've been pretty careful when I mention some things...I'm not scared to ride the fence. I'm not sure that I agree with anyone, but I don't believe that impeachment is necessarily the answer.. Here's my question, and I do invite anyone to comment or send a link or anything with your response. I want to know!!!

If President Bush were out tomorrow, how would things be different? Who would you want to take his place? What action would be taken? Would it help the Iraqi people tomorrow? Would it hurt the American people next year? When is War right? (for those of you who say never, then you need to go study some world history. You need to go study any religion. You need to quit being a dumbass.) If violence is not the answer, and peace is not the answer...then what is the answer?

I'm sorry for all the questions, but I'm interested in knowing what people feel about things that go on in my head.

There's more...

I'm going fishing this weekend...by the time the sun comes up on Saturday, I should be waist deep in water. I love to fish, and I love to be one with nature. There is no experience, be it spiritual or emotional, that I have ever felt that compares to watching the sun come up out of the ocean water. No real release that compares to stalking "tailing" reds or an early morning "blow up" from a speckled trout. When your mind forgets to grind, and begins to wander around the morning bay...looking for signs...bait...slicks...and pretty soon you get relief. I've fished for 10 hours and barely caught enough fish to feed myself, and still left feeling completely cleansed. Sometimes I feel a little hungover, you know if you want to think like a fish...you need to drink like a fish!

What is it that you do that takes you away, if just for a little while?

You're all invited to come with me...join the food chain...go wade fishing!!!

Anyway...

I need some help! I need some people to buy a freaking CD or 12 so that I might get the 1000 of them out of my spare bedroom. You can do it here or here. I hate to beg, but I'm tired of looking at all these boxes!!! I'll tell you what I'll do...anyone who buys a cd from Lone Star Music
and then sends me an e-mail saying you did and what city you are from (it gives me the ability to see where the cd was shipped) then I'll send you a free T-Shirt. It's a hell of a deal!

Well, I should be back late Sunday...maybe I'll have some good pictures to post...until then...

Tags: optical illusion, foad, karma, impeach, wade fishing, Lone Star Music, Texas WettNex

I've been a real bad boy...

2006-08-21T18:50:00.000-05:00

I don't know why I've been doing it so much...but I just can't seem to get my ducks in a row.

I've been completely ignoring my blogging. I don't know why, I've had things to say...but its just been so hard to find the time. I mean I've had time, but just not the right time.

Plus, for the first time what seems to be a long while I've been writing some music again. I need new stuff, and it's just been drifting out of my head into oblivion for the last several months.

So I promise to start posting more...I've been wanting to get back into renting, but felt that I wasn't doing my renters or rentees any good by not posting.

So I'm going off to watch the first part of the cowboys game and then it's sit down time with the guitar...I'll let you know how it goes.

Catch me if you can...

2006-08-18T13:37:00.000-05:00

Going to be running for the next few days...Mineral Wells, TX tonight if anyone wants to come see the Texas WettNex. Then I have to do a little work tomorrow and its off to the Gulf of Mexico to do some fishing. I need to fish.

So anyway, I have quite a bit to get out there but I'm going to have to wait a few days.

I leave you with this question....If you were to die tomorrow and given the options of spending your afterlife with the most beautiful, caring, perfect person or spend eternity by yourself doing what you love to do (for me, it would be waist deep in ocean water) which would you choose?

Michael

the current state of the union

2006-08-16T21:35:00.000-05:00

fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck

that's it

thank you

Air Travel and the Death Penalty

2006-08-14T18:35:00.000-05:00

Don't have a whole lot in common, but they're on the plate today.

First off I got in from my little trip about 8:00 last night. Left Friday and two days and four planes later I was back in TX.

So I left work too damn early Friday thinking that the airport was going to be a mad house with all the heightened security. I was wrong...took me 12 minutes to get from the parking garage to the gate. It wasn't that they weren't checking, but evidently they just weren't checking as slow as I thought. There was an additional carry on check point right before you could get on the plane...I checked it all...avoiding the hassle.

So everything went pretty smooth...everyone threw their stuff out and didn't try to push the rules...well, almost everybody. I was watching the news early Saturday morning (by early, I mean 3 or so) and they were interviewing all these people who were "inconvenienced" by having to part with their gels and liquids...let me tell you what is an inconvenience...getting blown the fuck up!

So I said almost, and this is what I mean...there is a lady who is coming through security on the flight home. She's an attractive, thirty-something lady...a soccer mom for sure...looks like every other soccer mom that I'd like to....errr...I mean....looks like every other nice surburbanite mother of three who is involved in the PTA and the booster club. Well, she gets randomly selected and she turns into mega-bitch. She immediately starts to question the authority, she wants to know why they are choosing her, and then sits and refuses to have the security woman run the wand around her a few times and pat down her sides. The security lady is being as nice as possible and telling the woman that it'll only take a few seconds (it took about 35), but mega-bitch just sits down and folds her arms. This is where the supervisor or some other gentleman of authority walks over to her and asks her what the problem is. She says that she doesn't understand why she's been picked to be checked, and that she wasn't doing it. He responded with (and oh man I was cheering him on) "Fine, you don't have to do it...please exit the line and the airport." Yeah, he told her to move the fuck on! Well, she was absolutely appalled. She finally steps on the little feet and 35 seconds later its done.

BUT WAIT!!!

Stupid soccer bitch's bag gets searched...and she's packing some hair gel. "It's just hair gel, what's the big deal???" This was Sunday, its not like all this wasn't on every news and radio station all weekend. It's not like it wasn't posted every 20 feet in the airport. No, she wasn't a terrorist, but she definitely was a dumb ass!

ROUND TWO

So my buddy Jane left a comment on my last post, and I want to expound on my position.

I do believe in Capital Punishment...and I have a few reasons why. I agree that sometimes it would be more of a punishment for someone to spend the rest of their lives in prison. These cases are where the prisoner is completely isolated from the outside world...where they are left with nothing but their thoughts and dreams. Where they have nothing else to do or think about, but being in a small cell. I agree with that, and that is probably the worst punishment of all.

But, I do believe that there are cases where someone should be put to death i.e. Pre-meditated murder, or anything involving small children. Here are my reasons why.

If you believe in God, or at least an afterlife that is rendered by how you spent your life on earth...then you'd think that the death penalty would actually just be the beginning of the true punishment. For those who commit the most heinous crimes, then their death would lead to the most heinous afterlife. Whether you believe that they will spend eternity in a fiery lake, or as a insubordinate object, or getting boned in the ass by well hung midgets, the true punishment would be after death and not before.

I also think that it is not uncommon for "lifers" in anything, whether it be the pokey or the post office, to come to terms with their conditions and learn to be happy there. If I knew I was going to be in Prison the rest of my life, I would find ways to make those days somewhat happy. Sure I couldn't just run down to the watering hole for a cold one, but I could learn how to paint. I could learn how to play my guitar better. I could write a book (got nothing but time), and these things are encouraged. Remember that people in prison are being rehabilitated! Rehabilitation in the big house isn't a walk in the park, but its also not necessarily having to truly pay for your crimes. An eye for an eye and all that jazz.

Last, (I could go on for a while, but I have things to do) there is something scary about knowing when you're going to die. We all know that we're going to die. It's one thing that is truly inevitable, but our happiness is that we live until that day. We don't know when that day is...could be tomorrow....could be 50 years from now...and since we don't know, then most of us don't spend our days worrying about it. For the death row inmate, he spends his hours thinking about the time. He spends his time hoping that he'll get a reprieve. He spends his energy trying to change the fact that someone is going to take his life. He has no control over it. Neither do we I guess, but at least we don't know that someone else does (don't drop the God thing here, I'm talking about humans only) We don't know that on some specific day, at some specific hour, someone is going to take our life from us. How'd you like to live with that.

Anyway, I hope you all are having a great day...be sure to visit the new girl on the block. Go ahead...click it....you know you want to!!!

Here I go again...

2006-08-10T19:59:00.000-05:00

Going to jump around a bit...

Starting here...where a sailor stole a lap top from his submarine and went out and tried to sell the information off of it. Espionage! If the decision is made to court marshall this man, he would be eligible for the death penalty.

Let me break a minute and remind you that I'm from Texas...we kill dozens of people every year for crimes much less than this. A state that believes in captial punishment, because that's the way that God and General Sam Houston intended it to be.

I cannot even fathom a man who would turn against his brother. I'm not talking about right side or left side, I'm talking about America as a whole. Sure we can run around our house and kick and bite and scream, but when someone threatens our family...we come together and we take care of the situation. A man who would turn on his country, like a man who would hurt a child, deserves to die.

I hope this man is treated fairly in trial, but if convicted I hope that true justice be done.

True as Texas Justice.

So...we had a serious threat to the West foiled today. I don't want to say too much before more information is sorted out and then released, but once again you see that this is a dangerous world. But still there are people who claim that we're the real terrorist. I've already read a blog that claimed the whole thing was made up so that we might start to support the war on terrorism again. Do you support a war on terrorism today? Did you yesterday? If you do not support the war (and I'm not saying you should or shouldn't), would you get on a plane tomorrow?
I am.

I will be boarding a plane tomorrow around 5 o'clock to go see a special someone...I'm not so scared that it would keep me from seeing her. I also may feel a little safer as to where I'm leaving from and where I'm landing, but would you take a plane to Washington D.C. or New York tomorrow? Even if you boarded that plane, would you really feel safe?

Wouldn't you like to?

On a very serious note, you should read here. It seems that higher prices are on the horizon. As if it doesn't piss me off enough that my electricity bill is twice as high this year than last. As if it doesn't piss me off enough that I can't even drive two days on $10 dollars worth of gas...oh no...this is going too far! It seems soon enough that I might not get my same two days worth of drinking for that same ten dollar bill.

What is this world coming to?

Tags: court marshall
capital punishment Texas beer

And the Winner is...

2006-08-10T00:40:00.000-05:00

This chick!!

I like her because she left me a comment and played along

BUT

She's knocking FOAD Thursday...hmmm...oh well....

It was a fair and impartial drawing (don't ask me how...I did it...and that's good enough)

Yes, I was hoping Jane would win...but it didn't happen....I may send her something anyway!

So Luin, we need to talk...I need some specifics...but you do have 200 credits coming your way....

I'm thinking about having another contest or two in the near future...by the way....go see the Filipina!!!

Just a few more hours

2006-08-09T19:24:00.000-05:00

Then I'm going to give some shit away...don't know why??? Well, there's a reason for that.

I've got a new roomie...you need to check out the Brat. I basically picked her because I've always wanted to spend some time with a hot young Filipina...err...I mean...well...

Truth be told...two things caught my attention. First thing was her favorite lunch (if you click her blog you'll know what it is) and anyone who will put themself singing (even if slightly off key) on their blog is cool with me.

I'm inviting her to post something here sometime this week...feel free to post whatever you want...I can take it.

While voting on some Blog Explosion battles today I ran across this post which then led to me to this post and I think I'll be checking back on both these girls in the near future. Good girls you take home to mother, bad girls you take home for yourself!!!

Which leads me to my next question...I've been taking an ass-whooping in the battle of the blogs here lately. I mean, its really gotten ugly. I know I haven't posted much worth reading lately, but geez...I think I got beat by a blank blog with a picture of Osama on it the other day. I often wonder if people even read the blogs they vote on when they battle, or if they just wait the 20 seconds and then collect their credits...especially the ones for 8 credits.

I think that last thing happens alot when there is much on the line so I started only going in at 25 or 35...still getting licked...and not the good way! Oh well...I promise to start getting back into the swing of things soon...just been crazy lately.

I'm not asking for votes, just that you go collect your credits and then come back and stay a little while.

Oh, and just to prove that I try to read the blogs I vote on, even the big ones by the Burger...I never saw that guy having such a smoking hot girlfriend...and I wonder if the girl down the page a little bit is available. I'm going to be visiting Watch's blog every Wednesday for sure!

I also learned that my aforementioned Delilah was kind of a geek back in the day, but now her vibe is super sexy (hmmm...Stilletos) and I have to take time out to be serious. Cat's idea about society's effects and people "Pretending to be 'normal'" makes a lot of sense to me.

Well, I've gotta run...seems like its all I've been doing lately...and pretty much all I see in the near future...I need a laptop! I'll be back at 12 to draw names...right now there are just a few names in the hat...so, good chances for Luin, Jane, Iowacorn, John, and Steph. Family members aren't eligible to win! Sorry Mom. 2oo credits may be on the line.

Well, I'll be back soon!

Just a Reminder

2006-08-08T17:29:00.000-05:00

I've got a little thing going on! Read down a blog or two and then play along.

Grandpa

2006-08-07T13:47:00.000-05:00

Just a little more time for me to have Grandpa aboard as a renter...I can't help but think of a song everytime I read his page.

For all you "Dead Heads" you might remember the late-great Jerry Garcia singing this one...Willie Nelson remade it not too terribly long ago...just makes me laugh.

I'm My Own Grandpa

Lyrics: Dwight Latham, Moe Jaffe

Oh, many, many years ago
When I was twenty-three
I was married to a widow
Who was pretty as can be
This widow had a grown-up daughter
Who had hair of red
My father fell in love with her
And soon the two were wed

This made my dad my son-in-law
And changed my very life
For my daughter was my mother
'Cause she was my father's wife
To complicate the matter
Though it really brought me joy
I soon became the father
Of a bouncing baby boy

This little baby then became
A brother-in-law to Dad
And so became my uncle
Though it made me very sad
For if he was my uncle
Then that also made him the brother
Of the widow's grown-up daughter
Who of course is my step-mother

Chorus:
I'm my own grandpa
I'm my own grandpa
It sounds funny I know
but it really is so
Oh, I'm my own grandpa

My father's wife then had a son
Who kept them on the run
And he became my grandchild
For he was my daughter's son
My wife is now my mother's mother
And it makes me blue
Because although she is my wife
She's my grandmother too

Now if my wife is my grandmother
Then I'm her grandchild
And every time I think of it
It nearly drives me wild
For now I have become
The strangest case you ever saw
As husband of my grandma
I am my own grandpa

That's good stuff...

Tags: grandpa Jerry Garcia

I'm No David Hasselhoff

2006-08-07T02:20:00.000-05:00

So me and a couple of my friends went down to float the Comal River yesterday. Thanks to the great people at Corner Tubes we were on the river with our trusty cooler tube a little before 2.

We were doing what you do on the river...sitting in a tube...drinking cold beer....and talking as if there were no one around. We were involved in casual conversations about work, and life, and the nice "scenery" that floated around us; all filled with expletives and other foul gestures of course.

Coming up on the "Tube Chute"we had to make the decision who would be the one with the greatest responsibility known to tubers...who was going to take the cooler down. The Tube Chute is a man made rapid that snakes around a little and then blows you out down into a whirlpool of water...strong currents that will either push you down river, suck you back up river, or just spill all your beer and ruin your trip await at the end. You've got to know when to start paddling once you get through it or you end up stuck back up on the upper end of the pool. It's not like a class 5 rapid or anything...I don't know the system, but I doubt it would be a class 2. For the weaker swimmer it is a little dangerous, but there are life guards around. The part where the chute meets the pool has been known to claim many a hat, or sunglasses, and of course it likes to tump coolers and steal ice and beer.

So there I was...I felt up to the task...this wasn't my first rodeo and like a seasoned veteran I positioned myself to secure the cooler and to be ready to row my way out of the whirlpool. I made it through unscathed...the true tubing talents I showed were immaculate...the cooler was never at danger...I was in great position to continue downriver without any delay...and then I saw something. I saw flowing hair just under the surface of the water. I saw a small head bob up and gasp for air. I reached down into the water and pulled a small girl up onto the edge of my tube. She was clearly panicked and desperately trying to catch her breath. I asked her if she was alright and she only responded with "Thank you" She had lost her tube coming out of the shoot and and was being sucked away by the flowing water. I don't know how many people had passed by or over her, but I know how many were coming behind me.

She collected herself on the edge of my tube and again starting saying "thank you" over and over. She then asked me if I could float her across the river so that she could rejoin her group. The river gets shallower after the rapid and I floated down a little to where I could walk her across. Now mind you, while all this is going on I've still got the cooler secured with my feet...it was never in danger...except for the buzzards I call my friends who were swarming to get their hands on my little 12 oz. buddies. I made sure the cooler was in good hands, and then proceeded across the river. I found a small family, holding a empty tube and clearly very concerned, who were glad to be reunited with their little girl. At one point I walked across the river, holding the hand of a little girl I didn't know...I imagine the view point of onlookers who hadn't seen the prior events...a drunken twenty-something redneck holding the hand of a little girl while he walked across the river...they probably thought I was some kind of molester.

By the way, I want to add that the ease of which I walked across the river rocks was credited to my new pair of Crocs. These things are a must have!

Now I didn't pull any Baywatch moves on the river. I wasn't perched high on some tower and go running to the rescue...I didn't do the full speed dismount off the side of my tube and swim to the drowning victim...I was just in a certain place at a certain time and did what every person is supposed to do...help someone in need. I think that too many times people just look away when someone is in trouble.

I'm not asking for praise, and I'm no hero. The conversations we had both before and after this incident might make a sailor blush, a woman cry, and my mother go get the soap. I just hope that a little good gesture might make up for some of the bad!

There were many days that I've floated the river and talked about picking up a chick...I never saw this one coming.

Tags: David Hasselhoff, Corner Tubes, Comal River, Crocs

The tricky deal

2006-08-06T00:34:00.000-05:00

Let me first apologize to my renter for not posting very much and working on traffic

So the thing about do this whole blog thing in the first person and by the real name is that sometimes you don't want to share too much.

You see...I have family that reads this...brothers and sisters, nieces, best friends, and of course my Mother...so I sometimes censor myself a little...but you should read all the posts and you'd see I don't leave too much out.

I believe in being myself, sometimes no matter what the cost. I think there are many times where I could have been something different or achieved so much more by being something else, but I just refused. I a'int saying its right, but I'm Michael Fucking Wren...I cuss too much, drink too much, think too much, sometimes I talk to much, feel too much...I might give too much, or take too much...but I don't stray too much from what I think I am.

So with all that being said, I've been staying away from the keyboard as of late. I thought about starting an anonymous blog, but that'd feel too much like lying. I'm not saying I never lie, I'm just saying I'm not right now. It's been a rough couple of weeks...there have been some great times mixed in...but its been rough. I've been down...even thought about another trip to the Witch Doctor to see what they might prescribe me...but I hate to be medicated...because I hate to feel away from myself. I really just think I might be tired...I've been pushing lately...trying this whole rock star thing out. I just don't want anyone to think I'm fixing to jump or anything...because I'm not!!!

I struggle with this crap sometimes, because feeling down makes me feel weak. I hear things like, "You are what you think" and I think that I'm not crazy at all, but just think I'm crazy and that if I'd stop thinking I were crazy, that maybe I wouldn't be so crazy at all.

This makes me question so much. Plus I think I'm just at the age of question. I'm sneaking up on twenty-nine (because I've got to be 29 before I can be 30) and I think that its high time I start to question. Maybe not so much time to question, but time to form an opinion. I would say make a plan, but I think I'll be ready for that later. I question politics, I question religion, I question my own actions and the actions of others. Issues and topics that I used to stay away from, either because of their gravity or my lack of knowledge, I now find myself taking on and either researching or already knowing enough pertinent info to form an opinion.

Man, I feel a hardcore rant coming on...not one that I plan on censoring...so I might want to take that up later...but here's a deal! I'm testing if people really read all of a blog, or just whisk thru...so I'm going to play a little game. From right now until Wednesday, August 9th I'm running a contest. If you leave a comment on this blog...and it doesn't have to say anything at all pertinent to the content...it can just say, "Hey I read your worthless blog"...I will pick one person from that list to send a Texas WettNex CD (I've only got about 1000 of them left) a T-Shirt and two Koozies (because you shouldn't drink alone) and if you are a member of blog explosion I'll give you 200 credits. Let's see.

All right, well, sorry about the crazy post...

My First Time

2006-08-03T18:58:00.000-05:00

For FOAD Thursday...crap...I need a button! Maybe next time.

So I always like to go visit Jane's site on Thursday for the FOAD and channel some of my own anger out through her.

I wasn't going to ever join in...just watch from the sideline...but this morning she was going to sit this one out...seems like no one had pissed her off...What was I going to do? How am I going to make it? It turns out she has come around and done got pissed off...so I'm feeling much better....but once you get the old ball rolling sometimes it won't stop until it crashes into something.

So, for my first time....Fuck Off And Die

1. I'm not naming names, most people I work with will know from the description...but It's not my fault you forgot to call in the order you wanted first thing this morning in until this afternoon, it's not my fault that you bid the job too low and are losing money because you didn't realize my prices have gone up in the last 8 years, it's not my fault that you're guys don't show up to work on time, and it's not my fault you're a fucking moron...so...FOAD

2. Sales people...sales people...you call and you make your pitch and I say I'm not really interested...you don't understand politeness so you got to pitch #2 and I tell you that I'm still not interested and I'm a little bit busy...you don't understand how anyone wouldn't want pitch #1 or pitch#2 and ask me to explain why I don't want your product...well, because I want you to FOAD.

3. People who base their entire existence on the lives of celebrities...why are you so fucking lame? I don't care about Brittany and whatever her husbands name is or if they're still married, I don't care about Tom Cruise's baby being real or not, I don't care about Paris or Nicole or Jessica or that dude she was married to or anybody fucking else. I really don't care about Mel Gibson getting drunk and spewing slurs. Is his career ruined??? Who fucking cares....and for all of you who commit your life to following theirs...FOAD...it'd be better for you...put the cheetos down cheese dicks!

4. To those people who book shows for clubs...I fucking hate you all (except for the ones that have booked us) No, I don't want to send you countless e-mails and feel like the annoying fucks from #2. I don't want to call and call and call to have you act like an arrogant asshole once I get through. I don't care how many cds you see across your desk everyday, I'm selfish fuck face, I just want you to listen to mine. I just want a simple answer...yes you can play here...or no you can't...If you quit giving me the run around, I'll quit calling so much....So until I come to your club...FOAD

by the way...you should go to www.tossmmusic.com or www.radiofreetexas.org and request a song by the Texas WettNex. My suggestion for a good FOAD Thursday would be a song I penned myself...several years ago...probably on a Thursday...its called Get You Ass On Out Of Here. Go listen to it here

Feeling better...catch ya later

If You're Going to Play in Texas...

2006-08-03T18:32:00.000-05:00

You've got to have a griddle in the band...

Yep, I've been scoping them out for months now, but I finally pulled the trigger and bought me a griddle. Made Eggs and Bacon last night...AT THE SAME TIME!

Note...start bacon before eggs...oh well.

Anway, the little girl cat has started to like me again...I think she read my blog and started feeling bad. I mean, she isn't snuggling up to me or anything like that, but she does bite me in a much more playful way now...and doesn't seem to mind if I'm in the same room as her anymore.

I'm just rambling on here...I have so much to say but can't seem to collect it all. My mind hasn't been right for the last couple of days.

I want to be funny...its more fun to be funny. I have things to be funny, but just not the umph to be....errr!!!

If you like funny you should definitely check out my renter or you could read past post by me that I thought were funny like this one, or this one, and maybe this one. You have to read the second one...

Random Stuff

2006-08-01T19:05:00.000-05:00

So much to say...So Little Time!!!

I've taken on a new renter and once again I picked the one that just made me laugh. There were some very good offers out there to choose from, but I was in need of a good laugh and Grand-Pa fits the bill!

I've got a new real life roommate (what, there's life outside blogger?), and that's brought on some changes. It's a good friend of mine who is out of a place for a while. He brings with him two dogs, which interferes a bit with my three cats. So now his dogs are in the back yard and the cats are full time indoor animals (damnit). They're getting a hell of a deal seeing that its 145 degrees every freaking day. Maybe Al Gore has something going with this movie of his. Maybe he should keep flying and driving all over the world to promote his idea of not flying and driving so much.

Lots of topics coming at you fast here.

Why is there a call for the U.S. to step in to the crisis in the Middle East? (Which we're doing) When we get into something, we are criticized or criticize ourselves for putting our nose in other people's business. When we stay out of stuff we are criticized for not stepping in. I'm just a dumb hick from Texas...somebody fill me in! I read consecutive blogs today while surfing, one basically said that "W" was trying to take over the world and was a horrible tyrant, and the next said that Bush was failing as a leader by not taking charge of the problems between Israel and Lebanon. This has been a controversial Presidential term, but how the hell can the guy win? You couldn't pay me enough to be President!

p.s. I inhaled

My idea on how to stop terrorism...No More Virgins! So these guys think they are going to be awaited in the afterlife by a harem of virgins??? I say that we just make it law that once a girl is of the right age (perverts!) that they be coupled with a little would be terrorist and they do the nasty. Then their are no virgins to await in the afterlife, and maybe these guys wouldn't be so pissed off if they just got some every now and then. But we have lots of work to do to rid the world of the virgins who are already here...so everyone get naked and jump in a pile!

To the comment left on my blog by this chick who hates Texas...you can read the set up and comments here. Anyway sweetie, your comment saying that you can't have your own idea in Texas is absolutely ridiculous. That's like saying Everyone in San Francisco is gay or everyone in New York is rude or everyone in France is a pussy. I sent her a note telling her she should come down by Austin, because we're all just a bunch of crazy weirdos here...They even promote keeping it that way My advice for you would be to leave your selfish fiance and move back to Kansas...and take your little dog too! If you're not happy now, what makes you think you will be later on in life?

Ahh, the headlines...the top stories...and right beside the continuing coverage on Israel/Lebanon (hey, are the American troops still in Iraq...I haven't heard much about them) is the plea from Stephen King for J.K. Rowling not to kill Harry Potter. Because this would be a tragedy. It would be another loss of an innocent life!!!

I say kill him!!!

He should be shot for letting the little dainty Ron take the heart of Hermione (I had to google that, I didn't know how to spell her name) I mean, she is growing up to be pretty hot! You know that if Potter does die then there are seriously going to be some people who mourn him...and I'm not talking about in the book...that's weird! She could, and probably will have, threatening calls and e-mails and letters. It's just a book folks!!!

I was in a blog carnival featuring Rowling, you can read it here.

Speaking of death threats and killing and man this still irks me...Can you believe that Andrea Yates is not awaiting her execution? I know that some people rejoice that she was freed. It was a win for the mentally ill in America...errr!!! She drowned all her kids, one by one, and then laid 4 of them out on the bed. The tub she drowned them in had vomit and shit in it. This wasn't like the drowning in the movies where the guy shakes a little bit and then dies. These kids fought for air...the fought for life...the fought so much that they literally shit themselves. Everytime I run across another story about her, I just want to fucking scream!

Today is the anniversary of the University of Texas Tower shootings...talk about another fucking Pyscho. Charles Whitman...if he wouldn't have ate a couple slugs that day, he might have gotten off for reasons of insanity.

Anyway, I'm off to play some music tonight. Going to be solo acoustic...bound to be a good time. Would you like to hear me sing?

Hmmm...Technorati Tags??? Al Gore, Terrorist, Virgins, Harry Potter, Andrea Yates, Charles Whitman, Inhaled? There is so much to choose from!

This is a Stupid Repost

2006-07-28T15:49:00.000-05:00

It really is...

I'm going to be out of town for a few days and won't be posting...I was thinking about this post earlier.

It's really funny the reactions that it got from some people...but I think it's one of the best posts I've ever had.

A good look into craziness!!! By the way, be sure to visit the Watchlist

Sometimes Stupid isn't what you think it is.

Sometimes its nothing at all.

Sometimes its someone or something...or sometimes its nothing.

Somtimes its a feeling or sometimes its what fills the void where feeling should be.

So here I sit stupid...wondering where you are. Wondering where I've sent you to. Some stupid place. Sometimes I remember the the stupid things we did and the stupid way you made me feel and I wonder why I was so stupid to send it all away. Or was it stupid of me to think it would ever be.

Sometimes I just wish the stupid world would give someone a stupid chance.

Maybe I just wish I could give this stupid world a chance.

Maybe, I just wish this world wasn't so stupid.

I strongly believe that this stupid world let me be happy for the first time in a long tome to show me how crazy-stupid I could be. It drew the happiness out to expose the stupidness...and prevailed...and I'm so stupid I let it overcome me...but I can only be so stupid for so long.

At some point you have to shut up and take back your stupid life.

Is there a chance to say, "Hey, this was all stupid...let's do it another way"?

Well let's do it another way.

Sleep is stupid.

Why does sleep come for me at its whim? Why can't I control sleep? Sleep is stupid too! Can't I control all things stupid? Does stupid control me? Or does stupid just trick me?

Stupid control!
Stupid Sleep!
Stupid Dreams!
Stupid Stupid!

And your the only one that ever made me feel this way...so stupid...what do you have? What do you have? I know....but is it so stupid? Am I just stupid? And when did Stupid start trying to be a good thing?

Are there stupid heroes?
Are there stupid saints?
Am I so stupid?

Do I really feel this stupid way about you? Will you ever feel that stupid way about me? Did you ever? Will you again? If you do...and if I do...will this stupid world ever give us a chance? Is there a chance? Is it a stupid chance or a stupid chance? Do I want a chance? Do you? Or is this all just really stupid?

Stupid heart
Stupid brain
stupid love
stupid sleep
stupid fears
stupid tears
stupid me!

One of My Kids Doesn't Like Me!

2006-07-26T23:45:00.000-05:00

Well, I thought about making this sound like I already have kids and stuff (hell, I might) but I just can't get into it.

For those of you who have read my earlier post, or those who need to catch up I was invaded by a pregnant cat and now find myself raising her illegitimate children.

Okay, I've never been a cat lover and all of the sudden I have three. No big deal...I'm a cat man now. I had a ferret once, but he drank too much and ended up drinking himself to death. That was the coolest ferret, and I miss his antics, but I'd never have another one. So now all of the sudden I like MY CATS not all cats, and I'm taking care of them.

This little bastards were born in a nasty box on the third shelf of my broke down shed in the back yard. They were lucky I even found them, and even luckier that I eventually moved them in the house. I've given them shelter from all the elements, and I've kept them and their mother fed for months. I've changed litter boxes and bought toys and scratchy thingies and I can't believe I'm telling you all this.

See, I'm having a problem because the little girl cat doesn't like me anymore. She doesn't like me to hold her, talk to her, be in the same room with her...I thought that wouldn't happen until at least puberty. The little boy cat loves me! He's laying in my lap right now...purring...while asleep...but she is somewhere hiding in the darkness.

She'll come bite me when I'm sleeping...attack me when I'm not looking...but affection? None!!!

I tried to have a talk with her earlier. I picked her up and asked her "Why don't you like me anymore?" "What have I done that's so wrong?" "Haven't I always tried to give you everything you've ever needed?"

I even went as far as saying, "you're lucky you're even alive!" "I pulled you out of that nasty box...I gave you a home...a warm place to stay...and now I feed you and make sure you have plenty of water and even have bought you toys....and this is the thanks I get!!!"

Ungrateful little skank!

And the bad part is the little boy kitty is just as affectionate as he can be. He sits in my lap, and crawls up my chest, and on the night of my birthday...as I lay there all alone...he jumped on my bed and licked my nose. It was the only time he has ever done that (I wonder how they know) but it pretty much sealed his fate as house kitty.

I'm thinking about contacting my renter and seeing about selling that little ungrateful sleaze on eBay. He's got the inside track...be sure to go check it out.

Can you sell a cat on eBay?

How am I ever going to be a real parent?

A Rant!

2006-07-25T18:23:00.000-05:00

Its happened again...I've been reading articles and blogs.
Damnit...

So I hear all these "facts" and opinions about Israel and Iraq and the wars that rage on...I've also heard one of the stupid things I think I've ever heard.

I try everyday to be somewhat of a good American. I try not to denounce our President and other leaders. It's not because I'm a big Bush fan, but because I believe an old idea of a unified front. I believe in the, "if your not for us, you must be against us" philosophy to an extent. I don't want to tell you that I did vote for Bush one time he ran, and didn't the other. I'll tell you I didn't vote for Al Gore. I will tell you that I think Australia would be a great place to live. At one time I thought Texas was the only place for me (there a'int no better place to be) but maybe Canada would be a good spot to park and rest a while.

I'm tired of the war in Iraq. I'm not saying that we shouldn't have gone to war (although I think they should have been a little more honest as to why they went to war...the duped us on the WMD thing) I'm saying that we shouldn't still be at war. I'm no "we should pull the troops out" tree-hugger, I just think we should have already ended this thing in victory. What happened to "speak softly and carry a big stick"? I fear now that there is no chance of victory. I think of one time I got into a little scuffle in college, I woke up the next morning with a busted lip and nose...all my friends called to congratulate me for winning the fight...I didn't feel like a winner.

I'm tired of far out liberals. I saw a picture of a protest sign today that said, "I only support our troops when they shoot their officers". I wonder if they have ever thought how they got the right to hoist that banner.

I'm tired of hearing about gay marriage and prayer in public schools. I say write a law where only states that allow public prayer (of any kind) can recognize a same sex marriage. Then everyone's happy...except for the atheist and muslims and the ACLU.

The ACLU is supporting the Westboro Baptist Church...as if they're place in hell wasn't already secured.

I'm tired of hearing about people wanting George Bush to intervene in Israel...if he'd had already intervened...then we'd be telling him how wrong he was doing it. Let's just circle around them like in Junior High...when it looks like one of them is definitely on top...then let's step in and break it up.

I'm tired of hearing Americans whining about still being in Beirut. The government is botching the recovery operations...What the Fuck? You're in Beirut not the Bahamas...you didn't recognize an escalating situation? You didn't realize that you're in a place where people walk into crowded areas and blow themselves and everyone they can up? AND!!! You have never thought about how you're in a part of the world where Americans aren't real popular? Did you ever think that putting as many Americans on a couple cruise ships is a real easy target for some crazy terrorist? Let's rush into that Love Boat!!!

Is it Thursday???

So now for the stupid! I'm sure that all of you get these crazy things in your e-mail how Hillary Clinton supported the Black Panthers or Andy Rooney tells off the world...and they're never true (or completely true) and there is a good web site that takes on these myths called Snopes. Well, yesterday I got an e-mail talking about New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin and his incompetence. So a Texas based company (yeah, still the best state) offered to pay $100 per car to haul off these cars left behind in the wake of Hurricane Katrina...of course they were going to make some money off the scrap...but this would have netted N.O. about $5 million. Nagin turns it down and now they are paying out the Nawlins' nose for the car removal... you can read the snopes report here . I've never been real impressed by old Ray, but this just takes the cake!

If anyone has another side to this story...I'm man enough to listen. I'd hope that you could prove me wrong, because this is just JACKASS!!!

So there it is...rant, rant, rant....

I'm tired of ranting.

Hey, the Texas WettNex cd is# 18 on this chart It's called Leaning In and I penned the title cut...you can hear this song and more here.

Also, be sure to visit my renter...it's my first shot at this, and I want him to have a great time!

Rental Property With a Great View

2006-07-24T13:27:00.000-05:00

So I've decided to try this whole rental thing.

Please welcome my very first renter, The Watchlist, to the page. I tell you that it was a tough decision on who to choose. There are some really great blogs out there. In the end I had to go with my gut, and my gut said it was hurting from laughing so much at some of Watch's post.

It's not all fun and games over there though...we may not always agree on the subject, but he does take on some important issues! Plus I'm hoping by having him on the show for a week that I'll get one of those cool weiner roasters.

So be sure to go by and tell him hello.

Is it against the ethics of blogging to battle your renter???

For those of you that didn't make it, you all had great blogs and hopefully we can do this again sometime.

Other news is that my blog has made the Best of Me Symphony again...its all the way at the bottom this time...but go over there and check it out.

Turn off the Mic!!!

2006-07-17T23:08:00.000-05:00

Disclaimer: I'm on the verge of a little dip, which is very unfortunate seeing I have a busy week ahead, and so I have felt the urge to be really nasty with my talk all day long.

Fuck! Sometimes it just makes me feel better to say it...Fuck, fuck, fuck...fuck Yeah!

So anyway, "W" slipped up and said a few candid things to the PM. OOOOOPS!

I wonder how things like this really happen. I wonder if George called Blair today and said something like, "Thanks a fucking lot dick face...as if I don't have to put up with enough fucking scrutiny already! You fucked me...yep, You fucked me! I oughta whip your ass!"

Because this is what I would probably do...and if I didn't want anyone to know about the couple times I have ended up in the pokey...or the few times I inhaled...or that time with the three midget strippers...all right...there weren't three...then I might run for the big office and maybe just win.

I do think its funny, watching the different news mediums today...seeing how they each took different snippets of the conversation. Why can't we all just be honest?

Think about this...I walk into work tomorrow and say, "Man, I'm really fucking hungry this morning. I hope the Taco Lady shows up early, I'm so hungry I could eat a fucking dog this morning." (I don't really talk like that at work)

Now channel 67 reports on my entrance this way...Wren was quoted, "I'm fucking hungry so I'm going to eat a fucking dog."

Channel 68 (they're on my side!)..."I'm hungry, I hope the lady shows up early so I could eat this morning."

Channel 69 would report..."I'm fucking the Taco Lady this morning!"

This is how it works.

I hate politics.

The Texas WettNex are on the roots charts . If you don't know the WettNex please visit their site at www.texaswettnex.com or the MySpace at www.myspace.com/thetexaswettnex or you can go learn more about me at www.myspace.com/michaelwren

Stupid Blogger!

2006-07-12T22:19:00.000-05:00

Screw You Blogger!!! This is the second time tonight you have chosen not to post my blog. The second time that I've spent my time on posting something for you to choose not to post it.

Oh, maybe I should write the blog in another application and then copy it to blogger?

Well yeah, I used to do that but I got tired of having to go back and put all the punctuation back in because you kept deleting it!!! It took me as long to find and fix all the mistakes as it did to write them damn post.

Screw You Blogger...no, no...Fuck you Blogger!!!

So here's the scoop on the blog I've written TWICE tonight. This is the shortened version!

I posted last night that I couldn't sleep and it turned around and bit me in the ass. See, I think I ate some funny chicken at the Chinese buffet on Monday, and my stomach has been not so good the last couple of days. I was late to work yesterday, and missed today because it felt like someone planted their cowboy boot square in my midsection. So the fetal position was my choice position of the day. I didn't have much choice but to sleep today, there's not much else you can do in the fetal position unless you're extremely flexible.

Let's see, I was trying to link something in my post(s) that I was writing...let's see...everyone please click on www.myspace.com/joelhofmann band and if you do that you have to go to my band website www.texaswettnex.com or on myspace www.myspace.com/thetexaswettnex and of course I tried to sit in with Joel's band last night at www.rileystavern.com

Okay, then I was trying to get you all to go to http://deadsilence.wordpress.com
I've been sitting here for several hours reading blogs over at www.blogexplosion.com You need to check this one out. This is a blog dedicated to Serial Killers...I'm not the biggest fan of serial killers...but I do like to watch forensic science shows...and serial killers always make for the best show.

All Right, well if this one doesn't post (which I'm going to copy the text this time) well I'm done for the night. If you are reading this then you'll know that I didn't go crazy and decide to bash my computer's brains in!

The Witch Doctor

2006-07-12T00:38:00.000-05:00

Here it is...almost one o'clock...I can't sleep!!!

I don't know why. I don't feel depressed. I don't have millions of crazy things running through my head. Hell, I'm even a little bit sick! I haven't been able to keep anything down for over 24 hours.

I was in on the Joel Hofmann Band gig tonight, but had to sneak out early. I thought I'd come home and crash...still wide awake!!!

So now I'm sitting here and thinking of heading back to the Head Shrinker. Not that I think I need to listen to more of her mumbo jumbo...but man if I had one or two of those little pills.

I didn't sleep at all last night! I tried and tried. I moved from the bed to the couch to the bed to the couch...I even tried my sister's philosophy of picturing myself sleeping. I pictured my self sleeping on my side, on my stomach, on my back, standing up...but no sleep!

The little pills!

I don't even like taking pills. I don't talk too much about crazy things, but let's just say that I don't like pills.

But man I need to sleep.

I may have to call Dr. Drugs-a-lot and tell her I just can't sleep!

I can already hear what she'll have to say

Ooo eee, ooo ah ah ting tang
Walla walla, bing bang
Ooo eee, ooo ah ah ting tang
Walla walla, bing bang...
Ooo eee, ooo ah ah ting tang
Walla walla, bing bang
Ooo eee, ooo ah ah ting tang
Walla walla, bing bang

Which I'm hoping means..."Let's see if we can find something to help you sleep"

UPDATE:

This is crazy here...I just got this e-mail. Let me just tell you that I love to play Poker. I don't love to play poker for the money...I love to play because its a fun game (but I do like winning money)

Check this out and then at the end think this...Don't we have bigger problems than this? Don't we have things that we can't seem to take care of, but somehow this got on the docket?

From my Email
Dear PPA Member:

Thank you for all you do to promote and defend the great game of poker.

On Tuesday, July 11, 2006, American poker players were dealt a bad hand by the U.S. House of Representatives. In a 317 to 93 vote the U.S. House passed H.R. 4411, sponsored by Jim Leach, R-Iowa, which would prohibit banks and credit card companies from processing payments for online gambling bets. It also includes the major provisions of another bill HR 4777 by Robert W. Goodlatte, R-Va., that would force Internet Service Providers (ISPs) to block access or disable hyperlinks to Web sites that offer online gambling.

Inexplicably, this legislation provides exemptions for online horse betting, Internet lotteries and certain fantasy sports, yet poker and other online games are swept into this prohibition bill.

The Poker Players Alliance has worked tirelessly on your behalf to keep this bill from passing the U.S. House. While our efforts have fallen short today, we have had tremendous success in delivering our message to lawmakers and the media. This fight is far from over and we hope that you will continue to stand with the Poker Players Alliance as we continue to fight to ensure that this misguided legislation does not become law.

Each day our organization is growing in both numbers and influence. I ask that you help us in that effort by encouraging all your friends and family to join the Poker Players Alliance. Whether someone plays poker or not, all Americans who value individual liberty and personal responsibility should be part of our campaign.

Now is not the time to waver, our voices must be heard loud and clear. Members of the U.S. House who voted for this bill should know that you oppose their position and similarly, those who voted against it should be applauded for their courageous stand. A list of the recorded vote is available by going to http://clerk.house.gov/evs/2006/roll363.xml. Please see how your Representative voted then call or write to let he or she know how you feel.

Again, we are grateful for your dedication to our cause and we share your love for this game.

Sincerely,

Michael Bolcerek

Poker Players Alliance Responds to House Vote Banning Online Poker

Washington, D.C.(July 11, 2006) — Michael Bolcerek, president of the Poker Players Alliance, released the following statement after the U.S. House of Representatives passed legislation that would prohibit Americans from playing poker on the Internet.

"We are disappointed that the House of Representatives would assail the rights of Americans to enjoy the great game of poker on the Internet. It is unconscionable that a skill game like poker gets swept into the net of prohibition, while online horse betting and Internet lotteries get free passes," said Mr. Bolcerek.

"The United States should follow the lead of the United Kingdom by regulating and taxing online poker, not banning it. An economic analysis just released by our organization shows that U.S. regulation of online poker has the potential to raise more than $3.3 billion in annual revenue for the federal government, in addition to another $1 billion for state coffers. We hope that this analysis will give a fresh perspective for U.S. Senators about the benefits of regulation.

"The Poker Players Alliance is undeterred in its mission to promote and protect the game of poker and we will continue to advance the cause on behalf of poker players in the United States."

A copy of the Poker Players Alliance economic analysis can be found at www.pokerplayersalliance.org.

The Truth!

2006-07-11T12:48:00.000-05:00

I decided a few months ago(well, it seems like a couple of months, but I think its been close to a year or so) that I needed to become more involved or at least more informed when it came to this world's politics.

I was feeling the need for association. I was looking to form my opinion on whether I was a democrat or a republican, or at least who I agree with more...it turns out I'm just trying to see which one I trust less.

So now I think we've just got a white house full of snakes (but they are our little snakes!) and I'm all of the sudden feeling really guilty for being so rude to the real reptiles.

I'm choosing not to choose, which by the old adage just makes me part of the problem.

Well, maybe so...but what I won't stand for is false degradation or the spreading of lies by people who don't care that their lies effect all those people who don't care to see that they are lies.

So this e-mail about Social Security and the Democrat's influence on it is going around, and I decided to expose it...or most of it...and I still hate Al Gore.

http://www.snopes.com/politics/taxes/sschanges.asp

Harry Potter

2006-07-10T21:18:00.000-05:00

Look to see what they had to say on the JK Rowling edition of Best Of Me Symphony

http://gcruse.typepad.com/the_owners_manual/2006/07/137_best_of_me_.html

Just look for the picture of Billy Blanks

A Bad Day in an Up State

2006-07-09T21:35:00.000-05:00

It happens sometimes.

You might want to call it unfair...you might want to say, "damn it, I just spent damn near two weeks down in the dumps and I finally bounce back and this happens!!!"

Hey, you just gotta keep on keepin' on!

But I did have a bad day. It's not anything I really want to share here, but I was a little angry, and a little disappointed, and a whole lot sad today.

Let me tell you one thing I've learned (not that I can do it every time) in my 28 or so years...Sometimes its just better to keep your damn mouth shut. Especially if you have a mouth like mine that sometimes spits out things that you aren't supposed to even be thinking about. It's better to think things through, and look at all the sides of the story. That's why I was only a little angry instead of a lot angry.

So what did I do? What every head shrinker would tell you not to do...I cracked open a cold beer!

I then pulled up my online poker account and started gambling. Now I'm no professional, but I can usually make a few bucks playing cards (well, until the beers start to stack up) but I was having some trouble today. I had to quit, because I couldn't get my mind to quit drifting back to it. I missed a few things, and not so much things that cost me money, but more things where I could have made money. Checking on that hand...err!!! I also got mad because I accidentally clicked fold on a straight hand. ERRRR!!!!

So I went outside and played with the monsters. Its funny how little things make everything brighter! They were running around and tackling each other. I was laughing at them. They were ganging up on momma kitty and trying to take her down. She would kick their ass for a second and then start licking them. I'm thinking I might let them in tonight...even if they are ankle biters.

I've already got Poon Tang in the house. She's sitting here cleaning herself on the floor beside me. You've gotta love a self-cleaning Poon Tang. She'll get up every once in a while and rub against me, and then lay back down and start her cleaning again.

You wanna hear a story I thought I'd never share? Poon Tang and I used to hold hands when we slept.

I know, sounds funny...but before she had the babies she would sleep in my bed at night (I think we were both lonely, and just looking for companionship...it really wouldn't have ever worked...or maybe she was just looking for her babies' new daddy...I feel so used!) She would sleep up close to my head, and one night I had my hand out and I woke up and Tang had her little paw curled up and was "holding" my first two fingers. I left it there so I wouldn't disturb her, and soon she was sleeping like this most every night. When she had the monsters, she quit sleeping in my bed. I can't believe I'm not deleting this paragraph.

So there you go...well, my mind is still drifting in and out of the little thing that got me earlier, but I'm feeling better. I think I'm fixing to go back outside.

Beer Me!

Pepperoni Pizza

2006-07-07T12:41:00.000-05:00

I wrote in an earlier post about my weird rituals of eating Animal's heads off (Animal Crackers that is) and Fried Chicken Skin (Yummy!)

Yesterday I had a couple slices of Pepperoni pizza, and what do you know...I remembered another. When eating Pepperoni Pizza, I eat all the pepperonis off the pizza before I eat the pizza.

I'm trying not to self-psychoanalyze, but it's hard not to. Feel free to leave your opinion.

So anyway, I came up with a few more...I'm a freaking weirdo!

Lucky Charms...Love 'em. I haven't had them in a while, but I'd eat all the toasted oat pieces first, and then eat the marshmellows last!

I actually had to focus on changing this, but I used to eat one thing at a time on my plate and I usually ate them in order of favorites from least to most. If it were steak, potatoes and peas then I would eat the peas first, the potatoes second and then the steak last.

Iced Tea...I use Sweet and Low...always two packets. 8 oz glass...two packets. 12 oz...two packets...64 oz...two packets.

Always have to have fair treatment for my appendages.

If I retie one shoe, I have to retie the other. If someone rubs one of my feet, they have to rub the other. If they don't...it drives me freaking crazy. Had an evil girlfriend one time who would use this against me. She'd rub one foot, or massage one hand and then walk away. Evil!!!

There are more...but....

Anyway, good news is I've started sleeping a little bit.

More Good News...The WettNex are playing at the River tomorrow night...check us out www.myspace.com/thetexaswettnex

Poetry Contest

2006-07-04T22:59:00.000-05:00

I feel like I've cheated...but I entered some song lyrics (that I wrote, so its really not cheating) into a a poetry contest.

Thought I might share them

If It's So Easy To Leave
Michael Wren
Michael Wren Publishing 2006

I'm not so much into love right now
I used to pretend that I didn't know how
Then you came along and somehow
I let myself, slip right in.

In is in until you're on the outs
Fingers point and you're full of doubts
Then theres tears and words and they're all about
Whose fault it is...it's mine again

If it's so easy to leave then just walk away
There's nothing here to see, its all gone away
If being done is the only way, then its the only way
If it's easy to leave...it's easy to leave

I think love is a fool's game
You jump right in and don't look both ways
Now I'm stuck out here and you've gone away
What do I want to say? What do I want to say?

I never thought you'd just turn and run
Look at these pieces, they've all come undone
I thought all along you were the only one
but now its only done
Where's all this coming from?

If it's so easy to leave then just walk away
There's nothing here to see, its all gone away
If being done is the only way, then its the only way
If it's easy to leave...then why don't you leave

Politically Bipolar

2006-07-04T22:08:00.000-05:00

I drove about 1000 miles this weekend...lots of time to think!

I spent several hours on the drive home today listening to radio talk shows. Its interesting getting policital views (and seeing the left and right influences through different programs) from different hosts from different states.

I see the United States as one big bipolar nation. We swing from right to left with every issue, action, and leader. Sometimes we're stable and sometimes the pendulum doesn't swing in full motion...but the whole thing is...we are politically bipolar. You can say you are on the left or on the right...you can say you're neither...but think about the nation as a whole and the way it reacts as a whole.

Ahh...we're all just another nut in the jar!

Animal Crackers and other odd rituals

2006-06-29T22:29:00.000-05:00

So today I wrote my sister an email asking her how she ate her animal crackers. We have many of the same little crazy quirks, so I was interested to know if she ate the head off before she devoured the rest of the cookie.

You're thinking about it...you might as well go ahead and answer...how do you eat your animal cookies?

Please leave a comment.

She gave me her response as well as the response from other people in her office. One very interesting ritual(and I do mean ritual) was disclosed. I will post all the replies later, but don't want to post them now for fear of them manipulating other people's answers.

You should think about some other things that make you pretty much crazy, and post them too.

I'll give you an example of a few of mine.

I always shave the same way...the left "outside" of my face, then the right "outside", then my upper lip, the middle part, and then my neck. Then I re-lather up, and do it the exact same way again. I've tried to do different, but I really have to sit and try to accomplish a difference. I think this might be why I hate shaving so much.

If there are two different light switches in a room that control the same light...it drives me crazy for one of them to be flipped up to turn off the light. My sister made me aware of this one.

Open doors or drawers drive me crazy!!! I can't stand to see an open door...I am constantly closing a fellow workers bottom drawer when she leaves it open...drives me nuts. I've only recently been able to sleep with an open door in my room, and that was so that Poon Tang could get in. If you haven't read any of my earlier post, you may want to catch up on that.

I eat all the skin off of fried chicken before I eat the chicken. I mean all the skin...if I buy a two piece, then I eat the skin off the two pieces before I even eat one bite of chicken...same with a three piece.

I haven't been very political the last week or so, and I won't get in too deep now...but I will tell you what Freedom is to me right now.

Freedom is the fact we can all be a little crazy, and not be ashamed to show it. We can all be a little different, and that's what makes us normal. We don't have to conform to our government's schedule. So whether you're way out left, or way out in right, You're still a fucking nut job...and that's okay! That's what Freedom means!

Music makes the world go 'round

2006-06-29T00:35:00.001-05:00

So I got a call tonight saying that the band didn't show at my second home...I was allowed to go fill in. Made a little money and got to play songs. The only real downfall is that I've got the post-gig insomnia rocking right now. I need to sleep!!!

I've been struggling for over a week now...sleep has been few and far betwixt but I feel my self coming around.

So I had a couple of realizations tonight...one, I haven't played by myself (not with myself) in a while and I was out of practice. I've been leaning on the band to fill in the accompaniment way too much. Two, I can sing pretty good. If you'd like a listen go to www.myspace.com/thetexaswettnex

So I am in a band, and you might ask why I didn't already think that I could sing good...and the answer is I have known for a long time that I could sing good, but the confidence that I have in my voice is not always real strong.

Take my buddy Joel from the Joel Hofmann Band ( www.myspace.com/joelhofmannband ), it doesn't matter if Joel is around 5 people or 500 people...if a song comes on that he likes...he'll just start singing. I can't do that...I doubt in my mind that anyone wants to hear me. When I'm on stage it's not that hard because you know you're up there and that you're up there to sing, but to just start singing is tough. I still haven't learned to sing with my eyes open!

Tonight though, as I listened for the first time in a long time to my voice through the speakers without a whole gang of other instruments around it I thought, "man, that's really pretty" and I mean pretty in the most manly way I can think. I think back to when I first met the guys that are in my band now...I won't go into details but we were at a place where local musicians went to play. I sang and the comment that one of the guys in the band made was, "I can hear the pain in your voice". Well, you might think this a bad thing, but to me it was a compliment. Like a truly good story teller...when you can make the listener feel the character's emotion, then you are truly telling the story as it should be told.

So whoopie you're thinking..."So you think you're good now...big fucking deal" and that's about all it is. I don't know that I'll have this confidence next time I open my mouth, but tonight I sit here and think...I made beautiful music. I sang the way I am supposed to sing, and I sounded like I'm supposed to sound. I wish I knew how to type so that you could understand the sound I still hear.

I hope that I might make that sound again...but for now I go to the back porch to wind down. I think about omens, and true happiness, and what we all can do when we put our minds to it. I think about what it is that makes us do and feel the way we feel and do, and why we sometimes try so hard to do or feel a way we shouldn't feel or do. I think about how sometimes letting go is nothing more than holding on and sometimes letting go is finally holding out. Last, I think that happiness is when you get to hold on to the one thing you just can't let go of, and sometimes I think I think too much.

I'm tired...

2006-06-27T19:23:00.000-05:00

this sleeplessness has got to go!

So, if the insomnia is not enough, last night I was continually attacked by the evil kitten mobsters Bonnie and Clyde.

Yep, they have been named. You would think that I would name them something more closely related to Poon Tang, but if you saw them in action you would know that they are a dastardly duo.

Today they are exiled to the back yard...they may stay there forever.

I actually started to put them out for short times a couple of weeks ago. I'd let them play for a while...I was scared to leave them out during the hot parts of the day, as they are still pretty young, but I was trying to get them properly acclimated.

Then it happened, I found a flea on the little girl (sometimes I call her Precious, and sometimes I call her Little Red and sometimes I call her Shit Head) There were to be no fleas in my house! I threw them all out and went and got some flea shampoo, and collars and spray for the house and treatment for the backyard.

The fun begins!!! Newsflash: Cats hate water!!!

I ran some warm water in the bathtub and got a towel ready and the shampoo set out.

I went outside and found the Clyde first (sometimes I call him Buddy, and sometimes I call him Hair Ball, and sometimes I call him, you little son-of-a-bitch I'm going to kick your ass if you don't quit doing that) he didn't wriggle and hiss and scratch too much, but man he made one of the most evil noises I've ever heard. It was painful to hear. I lathered him up and let him walk around all wet and matted up on the floor for the 4 minutes it said, and then I rinsed him off (with the painful screaming persisting on) and dried him off and sent him on his way.

Next was Bonnie, I figured she wouldn't be much more than Clyde was. He is the bigger and wilder of the two. You'd think by now that I'd have learned that it doesn't matter what the specie, a man might break your nose, but a woman will cut your throat. She came real close to clawing me a new one. I might have let my guard down a little, and she was ready to attack. I got her clean though, and the fleas have gone away.

Poon Tang...Oh I was dreading the cleansing of Tang. Don't get me wrong, I like clean Tang...but it was going to be a difficult task. I got her in there, and I think she knew what was up...Immediate motion...but with heavy persistence I finally got her wet...Pretty soon with some rubbing and some stroking...She was all lathered up!

What are y'all thinking about???

Now, I learned my lesson with the baby girl, so I was extra careful when bathing Tang. I finally decided to just turn the water on and run her back and forth through it like an old-time typewriter. That way I could keep both hands on her. She wasn't all that bad, and maybe even liked being that clean.

I could have saved all this by shaving Poon Tang.

What???

So Let's get up to where the damn kittens were attacking me last night. You see I dusted the back yard and didn't want them getting into it and getting sick, so I kept them on house arrest. They were fine at first, running around with their little collars and playing with each other. After midnight when I finally fell asleep, about two minutes after...I felt a nibbling at my toes. No, that's not a nibbling...that's like a fat boy on a pork chop..."What the hell are you doing?" as I kicked an unidentified assailant off of me. It was dark and I couldn't tell which one of the little bastards did it. I wrapped my feet up again, but its hot here and I was only in a sheet..."Fuck!" I yelled as someone else took a bit out of my ankle.

Yeah, I should have just kicked 'em out...but then I would have got of bed...Hell, I wasn't sleeping anyway.

This went on all night...running and jumping and biting and clawing and scratching and meowing

So today they are again in exile...no more toe biting...no more scratching and running around and jumping and meowing...

Oh, by the way...did I mention that I have two really cute little kittens to give away?

Damien

2006-06-16T16:41:00.000-05:00

Talk about a crazy woman.

I don't know exactly how true this is, but I read the story below

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/tm_objectid=17188458&method=full&siteid=94762&headline=born-at-6am-on-06-06-06--his-mum-was-induced-for-6-days--he-weighs-6lbs-6oz-and-he-s-called---d-name_page.html

Now, if all this is true...this woman must not have been paying attention to the movie...Damien didn't treat his mother very well!!!

My advice...don't buy him a tricycle!!!

Kentucky Friend Chicken

2006-06-15T15:48:00.000-05:00

Dangit...I'm ranting again.

I can't help it...there are just so many things going on in this world that just piss me off!

I think the main problem is that I put gas in my truck today...every time I put gas in the tank...I get really really agitated.

Or maybe I just need to quit reading the news!

So yesterday I read this story http://aolsvc.news.aol.com/business/article.adp?id=20060613105009990014&cid about this group who is suing KFC for frying their chicken in oil that is full of Trans Fat. I'll admit, that I don't really know a whole lot about trans fat, good fat, real fat, or any other fat. What I do know is that I can't remember anytime someone called fried chicken healthy.

It's Fried Chicken...I'ts Fried...In Oil...It's not healthy.

But we do live in a country where we can sue Marlboro because we smoke too much or sue McDonalds because their hot coffee was too hot. Criminals who hurt themselves while victimizing innocent people can sue those people and win. I think I'm going to sue blogger because I seem to be getting addicted to this whole blogging thing.

It's Fried Chicken!!! If you don't want your arteries to be full of gunk, eat a fucking salad!!!

I guess I just hate the way things are turning out. What you do is go out and screw up, and then blame someone else for it. Everyone else is to blame, and that's that. Me and a buddy of mine got drunk some years ago and hit a median and rolled a car. We should have sued Chevrolet for making a car that would roll, and the city of Dallas for putting that concrete median in the middle of Abrams avenue.

I'm not going to sit here and tell you I never whine a little, but I think it's a sad world where no one will take any responsibility for their own actions.

On a brighter note, I'm really starting to love Thursday. I know that I've mentioned before that on Thursdays I like to read http://www.ocweekly.com/columns/ask-a-mexican/ask-a-mexican/25306/ because its just good stuff. It's both comical and informative. Now I've got a new Thursday read for you...for any of you that just get pissed off and want to slap someone every now and then, you should definitely read this http://janelovestarzan.com/

Well, until I get pissed again....adios

Leaning In

2006-06-15T00:35:00.000-05:00

This is the title cut to the Texas WettNex CD. I wrote it then, and I'm writing it now. I actually was asked the words to it. My first response was that they should buy a cd and read the liner notes, but that's not very polite. There are 5 other songs that I penned on that CD, so if they want the words to them they are definitely have to buy a CD.

Leaning In

Michael Wren

For a second you stop breathing

I can see the sparkle in your eyes

Can you see the way I'm leaning?

Or how a nervous boy works up the nerve to try?

I run my fingers down your face

take one last breath...I'm on my way

I'm leaning in

My heart's beating faster

I'm going after

your heart this time

I'm on my way

no looking backwards

I'm caught up in rapture

it's all on the line

For a second the world stands still

and waits for us to open up our eyes.

Still wondering if this is real

So I think I'll give it one more try.

Your touch on my neck send chills rolling

I don't want them to go away

So I'm leaning in

My heart's beating faster

I'm going after

your heart this time

I'm on my way

no looking backwards

I'm caught up in rapture

it's all on the line

The end of the night finds us on your doorstep

I don't know if I can walk away

I'm leaning in

My heart's beating faster

I'm going after

it all this time

I'm on my way

no looking backwards

I'm caught up in rapture

it's all on the line

If you've never heard this song and you would like to then you should go here www.myspace.com/thetexaswettnex and it will be the first song that plays. So there it is...let me know what you think!

This really....

2006-06-14T12:38:00.000-05:00

Pisses me off!!!

You should be pissed too!

I'm reading the news this morning and see this crap about the FEMA fraud http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/13310790/?GT1=8211 and I wonder how this could happen (maybe not how, but why). I think about all the people who were crying for help, the ones who said that they couldn't get any assistance from the government, yet we now hear of people who paid for strippers and porn and cruises and one who even had an extended stay at a Hawaiian hotel. Then there is a Senator who is on the rampage (and good for him and them that are) and I'm quoting, "This is an assault on the American taxpayer," said Rep. Michael McCaul, R-Texas, chairman of the subcommittee that will conduct the hearing... and I agree because this is heinous.

Oh wait...assault on taxpayers....

Then I read this... http://articles.news.aol.com/news/article.adp?id=20060613193509990009&ncid=NWS00010000000001
and I wonder if this isn't much more than an attack on the taxpayer. The federal minimum wage has been $5.15 an hour since 1997 http://www.infoplease.com/ipa/A0774473.html, but the congressmen have given themselves a raise every year for the past seven years. It's a cost of living allowance. This is the biggest joke I've heard in a while. Because people who make minimum wage evidently don't endure raises in the cost of living. Even in 1997 the average price of gasoline for this week was $1.37 per gallon, where as now its $3.11 per gallon http://www.eia.doe.gov/emeu/international/gas1.html. That means that if you make minimum wage, and you use more than one gallon on your way to work (which means it takes you another gallon to get home) then your first hour of work does not even pay for your expenses to get to and from work. That means that the average gallon of gasoline is over 60% of your hourly wage.

I should probably learn how to put that red profanity at the top of my blog to let you know that I might curse a little.

If you guys don't feel ass-raped right now, you must not be following along. What we have here is two very similar cases...and inept system, and a bunch of villainous people who saw their opportunity to take advantage of it...and all at the cost of us...the taxpayer. If there is a hell, these people will surely know.

Other than that, I'm having a pretty good day.

Two Dollars for a Taco???

2006-06-13T18:27:00.000-05:00

I've been sitting on this one for a while. I should have wrote it when it was fresh, but like the breakfast tacos I eat every morning...this one is a couple days old.

I don't really eat tacos every morning, but occasionally I need something to soak up the excess. So the other morning I'm walking out to the Taco Truck with two raggedy old one dollar bills. I walk up to the truck to buy something from a woman who speaks almost as little English as I speak Spanish. Luckily everything is there in plain view so I can motion to what I want. I point to two toppings and hand her my two bucks... she in turn hands me a plate with a taco and two shiny new quarters and I think, "What a deal!"

disclaimer: Although you can't tell by my dismal account balance, I do understand "paper" money and the value that is placed on the dollar. Just bear with me on this...

"What a deal!!!" I say to myself as I walk happily back into the office with my meal and my two shiny quarters. All I gave that woman was two grimy, nasty looking pieces of green paper and I got a delicious breakfast taco and two shiny new quarters. This is one hell of a trade. I can eat this taco, and I can show the shiny quarters off to all my friends. "Look, I got a Nebraska...have any of you seen the Nebraska yet?" I leave this transaction with a belly full of tortilla, beans and something that resembles brisket (have any of you seen my dog Lucky?) and the two shiny quarters, and these women drive off with two worn out pieces of paper. They can't eat that paper. If they were stranded in the mountains, those pieces of paper would provide no sustenance what so ever. Hell, they wouldn't even burn for much more than a minute. What good is paper? If it comes down to that, I've got more fuel source in the paper plate and napkins that came with the taco then they have with their dollar bills.

Oh, the all mighty dollar. The thing that makes the world go round. People strive for riches. People beg, they steal, they borrow, they kill, they lie...all for the dollar. Some people go about making money the right way. They work hours and hours of overtime. They choose to spend their hours on earth in the office rather than at home. They choose to spend long nights, weekends, after hours, early mornings...all for the dollar. All for something that can't really keep you warm...not in the most extreme condition. All for something that you can't eat, you can't drink, you can't breathe...oh, you can love it...but it will never love you back.

and I say to my buck-fifty taco, "What a deal!"

Did you heed the Omen?

2006-06-07T23:38:00.001-05:00

The world didn't end...woo hoo! And me??? Well, I guess I'm just another year older.

That's right...the devil's spawn and I both celebrated June 6th for our coming out party. I have people ask me if I was born at 6:06, I tell them no that I was born at 7:06 but most didn't get the joke.

06-06-06 was pretty much uneventful. I wanted to go watch The Omen but it wasn't playing in town, and I was playing with the Joel Hofmann band. We had a mighty fine time at Riley's Tavern. I'm going to be sitting in with them every Tuesday in June, so if you're around the area come on by.

Speaking of evil...why is it that people think that the proper thing to do on someone's birthday is to try to get them shit-faced drunk? Not that I was complaining too much, but man I felt bad this morning! "Hey good buddy!!! I like you so much I think I'm going to buy you lots of alcohol and watch you do something stupid!"

I've lived with this whole 6/6 thing my whole life, so it doesn't bother me much anymore. Hell the last three digits of my zip code are 666. I did however get kind of interested in the significance of 666 this year. I've known about the "mark of the beast" since I watched the original omen many years ago, but this time I wanted to know why it was the mark of the beast. There is a lot of reading to do...if you want to know I found this to be very informative http://www.666man.net/666religionhistoryoverview.html I would like to research this further before I make any more comments.

If anyone needs a cat, I have a couple to send you! My three-cat household is starting to wear me out. They aren't little helpless beings anymore...nope, now they can run and frolic and play and climb and claw and scratch and shit! They are still pretty damn cute though...I don't know how to put pictures on this thing (nor do I care to take them time to find out) or I'd let you see them. The other day I couldn't find them and I didn't know what they were up to...turns out they were sleeping in an open box...I had to take a picture...no, I'm not gay! If you're not up on the story I was invaded by Poon Tang the cat who decided that she needed to have two little kittens in my shed...who then were smuggled in http://mwren.blogspot.com/2006/05/here-kitty-kitty.html. One is dark and one is light, you need one...you need one...you need both...you need all three...and the dark one is starting to try to win favor. I woke up a little disoriented about 2:30 on 666. I knew it was my birthday, but I was trying to find the time. When I figured out that I wasn't late for work and rubbed my eyes and looked around...the little bastard jumped up on my bed, licked my nose, and then curled up in a ball beside me. Errrr....I hate cuteness!

So, I have lots of things on my mind today. This is going to be another one of those random topic type posts. I've been surfing blogs at www.blogexplosion.com . There are a lot of interesting topics there...if you just go to surf member blogs and start reading you will find a lot of information. Its pretty interesting to get other peoples takes on things. The people that are just doing it to share their opinion, instead of ones on TV or Radio talk shows.

I usually find the political ones to be of the most interest, but there are also some people who are just down right intriguing, no matter what they are writing about.

There are the people who love bush, and the people that hate bush and then there are the people who actually talk about the President. You get people who keep up with their favorite sports teams, their family, and then people who just want to show the world how stupid they are and I respect all of the above. So from some of the ones I read today, here is my opinion.

A blog about stopping corporal punishment in the home:
I don't have kids so I don't know if I'm the one to have a take on this, but I was a kid (until yesterday actually) and I know people who have kids so I guess I have a take. I know that there was a lot less violence in public before we invented time out. I know that there was more respect for people before kids no longer respected their parents (yes, fear is part of respect) since they could hide behind the system. I do not think children should be beaten or abused, but I think as a parent you have the right to spank their little asses when they need it. Most folks down here in Texas have heard the phrase, "What that boy needs is an ass-whooping!" I know its been said about me a few million times, and truth be told I probably needed a few more ass-whoopings than I got. I do not think a child should be terrified of a parent, but I do believe that they have to have a fear of the consequences of their action. But what do I know?

Brangelina....Who Fucking Cares??? A lot of people evidently. I see it very sad that there is a demand for all the coverage about this couples baby...or this couple period. Why is it that we (the people) have this obsession with celebrities? Is it because we want to be like these people, is it that we might never be like these people? There are blogs dedicated to the Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie relationship...That probably won't last...because celebrity relationships never do....because there not supposed to...because if they did then we (the people) wouldn't have anything to watch and talk about! and let me be guilty of this...what the hell was Brad thinking when he left Jennifer Anniston (I probably misspelled that)? Why do we follow all these people, and wonder what they had for breakfast and what they bought on Rodeo Drive? I don't care much, well when Tara Reid's boob fell out and the whole world caught it on tape, I was interested! I bet if we showed as much interest in how our neighbor was feeling today as we did about TomKat or Brangelina, than this world would be a better place.

I saw a blog from a military man (he said he was, and by God, I believe him) who had a post about the god hates fags bunch. I had an earlier post on these idiots http://mwren.blogspot.com/2006/02/whispers.html. He was much more couth than I was, and that's a big credit to him since seeing he was military then they were calling him a fag. Anyway, it showed a video on it of the jackasses being attacked by some angry funeral goers. I hate to say this (well, not really) but I wish the video would have shown one of the funeral goers getting a good hold of the church of dumbass ( www.godhatesfags.com) and giving one of my aforementioned ass-whoopings!

I think I'm starting to ramble now...and its getting close to 1 am and I need to force myself to sleep!

two last things!

one - The Dallas Mavericks are in the NBA Finals. Now let's just see if we can "Hack-a-Shaq" our way to a championship!

two- For those of you who read the Italian post, we (the WettNex www.texaswettnex.com) received an e-mail from a French radio station wanting a CD to play. Now if these two countries want to hear the Texas WettNex, why the hell don't you???

Italian?

2006-06-05T14:07:00.000-05:00

I got some exciting news today...The Texas WettNex are being played on Italian radio!!! We were also given a good review (so I've been told)at www.lonestartime.com . I say I've only been told this, because I can't read Italian.

I'd give a free cd to someone who could translate this for me (correctly!!) They've promised me an English version, but it'll be a few days and I'm extremely impatient.

For any of you who like to review music, you should go to www.lonestarmusic.com and give the WettNex a review. Don't hold back, tell us what you really think.

sleep!

2006-06-02T01:57:00.000-05:00

I should really be sleeping!

As I sit here and think about sleeping (that doesn't mean I'm sleepy) I can't help but wonder back a few months to the days when I was prescribed Ambien. Pretty little pill!!!

Anyway, most of you have heard the stories about Ambien and the things that people do while under its influence...I thought I might share my stories. Luckily I never drove!

So it turns out that Ambien sometimes might take a man to his most carnal cravings, the most reported is food.

I had a head shrinker (witch doctor!) prescribe me Ambien several months ago. She thought if I'd get some sleep that I'd be a more normal person. So I went and got the prescription filled, and I took my first ambien. She warned me that I shouldn't be planning to do much after taking the pill, and I thought I understood. The first night I took it was about 10:00. She told me to plan on sleeping 8 hours, so I thought this would do me well. I took the pill and went and jumped in the shower...luckily I didn't drown but did fall down in the shower and somehow made it to the bed (soaking wet) before going out completely.

"This is great!!!", I said to myself the next morning. Sleep kicks ass! But it was very short-lived. You see the pills would still knock me out, but soon I was only sleeping 3 to 4 hours and waking up feeling great. This wasn't cool! That's how little I sleep already!

Stronger Ambien...that'll do it! So then I would sleep 4 to 5 hours (that's a long nights sleep for me!) Man I miss those little pills...insta-sleep...but not enough...but I won't get enough tonight...I need a beer!

But to the Food...so the not so funny story is about the egg sandwich. One night will ambienated I must have decided that I need an egg sandwich. I love the egg sandwich. There's nothing like toasted bread, a little mayo, and some scrambled eggs to get you going. Yummy! This one particular night, my carnal desired didn't quite follow the plan. I know how to make an egg sandwich dangit. I also learned (back in my really really dirt poor days!) that you can take an egg and put it in a bowl, stir it up, and drop it in the microwave for a minute and it comes out all round and nasty looking and ready to eat (yummy!), but I prefer the old fashioned method of scrambling it in the pan. Ambien doesn't like scrambled eggs...evidently Ambien likes fried eggs (barely cooked enough to stay together...extra runny...like on the floor runny) on two pieces of untoasted bread and dripping all over the place. I ate, and then went right back to bed...I'm sure I was satisfied!

The real good Ambien story is about Spaghetti. I'll tell you now that I love tomatoes and everything tomato. That means tomato sauce! I used to eat half tomatoes and ranch dressing as a snack when I was younger. Most of my friend ate bananas or twinkies or ding dongs (yeah, I just wanted to say ding dong) but I ate raw tomatoes. Love 'em! So one night under the influence (Ambien, not alcohol) I decided that I wanted spaghetti. I started off with some ragu or prego or some kind of sauce. So I start browning meat to put into the mix (I'm asleep...just wanted to make sure you understood this) I mix it all in, but somehow get confused as to my cravings..."What else do I want?"...."What else can go in there?"..."Corn!!!"...ewwww! but that's right...Corn is what I put in it...and I ate it...and I must've liked it because I ate a bunch. Not like whole kernel corn, but freaking cream corn! yuck.

By the way, this is all being done under the watchful eyes of people who call themselves my friends! I'm glad they like to be entertained by my Ambienage!
So I sit here now....at 1:45 and think that I wish I had some Ambien...2 - 7 would work out great.

Have you guys visited http://www.tossmmusic.com/ yet and requested a Texas WettNex song? You should do that! And buy a CD too!!!

Oh yeah, I've got another blog coming soon...so check back in a day or two...it's going to be a long one!

Pedophile Politicians

2006-05-31T09:12:00.000-05:00

Had to share this. It came from the strange but true news from aol.

I just thought we had the dirtiest politicians!

http://news.aol.com/topnews/articles/_a/dutch-pedophiles-to-launch-political/n20060530085709990013?cid=936

The Power of Persuasion

2006-05-28T11:51:00.000-05:00

This is something I've been thinking a lot about lately. I don't really know why, or maybe I do and don't care to share..but either way...

All of have heard this phrase, "The Power of Persuasion..." in some form or another. I try to be careful when it comes to assumptions, but this is one I'll climb out on the limb for. So, we've all heard this phrase, but I don't know if we've all thought about it...here are my thoughts.

This isn't based much on persuasion from outside sources or people (peer pressure), but more on the power you have over yourself.

One of the most obvious proofs of this occurrence is the "self-fulfilled prophecy". The number one example happens in offices and on jobsites through out the world. Ted comes in on Wednesday with a little sniffle and claims he thinks he's coming down with something, on Thursday he knows he's getting the flu, and on Friday he calls in sick. I'm not saying that Ted didn't have a little bug in his system, but what I'm asking is if he hadn't told everyone that he was coming down with something, would he have come down with something? Man, that's a long sentence with bad grammar!

I do not think that you can talk your self into actually contracting the flu, but that you can talk yourself into having the symptoms. Let's take the bird flu for example. This is a very scary thing that seems to have an inevitable path to the United States. Let's hope not, but it is a very real possibility. Right now there haven't been any cases of the bird flu reported, so let's get Ted back in the picture. Let's say Ted is just a very negative person and he thinks that he's just going to definitely be the first one with the bird flu. So he starts feeling the symptoms coming on...I didn't even know what the bird flu symptoms were so I had to look them up here http://www.bupa.co.uk/health_information/html/health_news/270104avianflu.html
it seems that many of them are the same as any other type of cold or flu, so this makes it really easy for Ted to believe he has the bird flu even if he only has a common cold.

Now let me just make this clear...Ted (or you) cannot make yourself have the bird flu. You can say it all you want, but this is a virus and you cannot make your body produce this virus. What you can do is make your body feel the symptoms of this virus. Then what you do is start over thinking everything, and soon you think you have pneumonia and will die soon...Persuasion.

I don't know that this is exactly what happens, hell I'm just an uneducated, alcoholic from a small town in North Texas...but I do have opinions and sometimes I like to read myself type.

So here is my question...I don't believe that you can talk your body into having a virus, but I do believe that you can talk your body into believing it does and therefore the symptoms occur...so, can you talk your body into fighting something that is not present in your body? Will your body, by persuasion, form anti-bodies to fight an enemy in your body that is not present? How powerful is your persuasion?

I'm no doctor, I've never played one on TV, and I didn't stay in a Holiday Inn Express last night, so I'm not claiming that my remarks neither past nor present are factual.

So here are more of my thoughts on this subject. You cannot argue that bad things in your body cause bad things to happen. If there is a harmful bacteria in your body, then your body will react to it, but wouldn't you think the way you react to these feelings would affect the way the sickness affects you? If Teddy boy starts to feel the blahs coming on, couldn't he say, "I've got something going on, but it will not get me down!" Would this lessen his symptoms and the terms of his sickness? Certainly you've said or heard someone say, "I'm too busy to be sick right now" and then they just keep working. Of course, I'm not saying that this is always best. I know of a few times where I was too busy to be sick, but when the work got done...so was I. Down and out for the long count.

I'm confusing myself now...let me switch to another thought that all of us can relate to (whether you want to admit it or not). Hmmm...its probably time for another disclaimer. I have never and probably will never be politically correct. Don't really care to be. So the next few paragraphs may not suit you much.

So one of the most obvious examples of the mind and the body clashing happens behind the closed restroom door. Ha ha, this is going to be fun. How many times have you been driving down the road, or walking through a department store or grocery store aisle when you heard and felt the rumble of the gut.

"Oh Shit!"

What are you going to do? This is especially more of a problem when you're in the car (or at the parents house of the girl that you have just started dating and you're meeting them for the first time...that's embarassing) and you start looking around for big trees or super clean restrooms. They're not out there. You try to talk your body into holding out for just a little longer. Then you feel the pressure subside a bit...your mind has won this round, and if you're lucky its bought you enough time to get home.

There it is again...this time it feels more like a big foot pressing down on your abdomen.

"Stay together cheeks!"

Round two is a little more difficult. There is still the chance that you can talk your body into clamping down for a bit longer, but its not a given...its touch and go at this point. Let's say for the sake of your pride that you win round two. Please let us get home!

"Uh oh!"

There isn't going to be a round four...this is a high-pressure situation and action has to be taken soon. You're trying to talk directly to the last line of defense here..."Clamp Up!!! Clamp Up!!!"

It's amazing how your opinion of public restrooms is tied so directly to the urgency of your situation.

Once again, for the sake of dexterity...let's say you make it home. Once there you take the proper steps to alleviate the problem, and all is well. You've never felt better.

The moral?

The mind can work at great lengths to battle what the body throws at it. The attitude that one takes to those situations greatly affects the outcome of the situation. Never have you heard someone feel the rumble in the bowels and say, "Well, I think I'm going to go ahead and shit my pants!" No, he holds out as long as he can. (There are a few out there that couldn't hold on long enough), so why wouldn't we all take the same stand against sickness. Why not say, "I feel something coming on, but I'm not going to let it take me down!" next time you get a little sniffle. In the end, the body (or the material things inside it that are tearing it down) is going to get some sort of victory. But with the correct thoughts, you could make sure that the victory is a small one.

The attitude you take in life is always going to affect your life's outcome. I'm not trying to toot my own horn here, but this last week and the week to come have been and will be pretty trying. I could have laid down and cried about all this, but that wouldn't have done any good. I did have to change a few things, as to my normal activities, but I've always made it through the trials in the past...and my attitude is that I'll make it through these too.

On the same line I'll answer the very ugly e-mail pertaining to the title of my blog. It basically said that I was a cruel person for claiming I was lucky to have something that many people suffer through for real. That no one with bipolar disorder would ever consider themselves lucky.

I answer you in public brother!!! I think there are many people who don't see their "disorder" as the worst thing that can happen to a person. Their attitude towards their situation dictates their being. Second of all, I'm a very creative person. Sometimes after days of no sleep, I come up with some of my best material. Sometimes, when I feel so low that I'll no longer make it, I write the most upbeat song on the album. Sometimes, when I feel so high that I am actually skipping through the house, I write the prettiest ballad you've ever heard. Have you ever researched the lives of the most famous people? Have you ever seen how the geniuses out there were completely fucked up? There is a very thin line between genius and insanity!

How can I feel Lucky? If I were normal, I'd just be normal! Maybe I am normal, and you are just less than normal! By the way, check this out

http://www.mental-health-today.com/bp/famous_people.htm

The Bandit Runs Again!

2006-05-21T23:25:00.001-05:00

So I headed out for the San Antonio Airport around 4:00 a.m. on Friday...my flight was at 6:25 and I should get there around 5...this should all be good. I know if I were going to the Austin airport it would all work out fine...I knew this.

I've told this story so many times this weekend I'm forcing myself to cut it short...I'll just tell you that I missed my flight due to problems with the security check point. I tried to get on the next flight, but there were no promises to be made as the flight was overbooked...It also seems the last one was overbooked as well, even though there were several other passengers other than myself who did not make it aboard.

The Dilemma:

Johnny B's wedding is in Santa Fe at 3:30 (ish), which I've just found out, and I'm sitting in the San Antonio airport at 7:30 (ish) trying to figure out how I'm going to get there. I call United (my original airline) and they cannot help me much. I think I may save this for a whole other topic, but let me say that United Airlines and the San Antonio Airport rate a little bit lower than dog shit on my list. So I get on the cell phone and start trying to figure out how I'm going to get the Land of Enchantment, and I'm needing a little Indian blessing to get me there. ABIA, Austin, TX, has got nothing...the flight gets to Albuquerque at 4:30 which is about the time that John, his beautiful new wife, and their wedding party are getting set to parade through the plaza...this won't work.

John makes a crazy suggestion and I make the call...Continental Airlines can get me there at 12:45 (mnt time) and it leaves at 11:45 (cst) from Houston...this sounds all good, but its almost 8:00 (we're still CST, cause I'm still in Texas) If you check www.mapquest.com you'll see that it's an estimated 3 hours and 21 minutes from the San Antonio airport to the Houston Intercontinental airport. Its a little over 215 miles and this estimation does not include the fact that I'm leaving San Antonio as the morning rush hour is at its peak, and will be entering Houston as the Lunch rush begins.

East Bound and Down, Loaded up and Truckin'
We're Going to Do What They Say Can't Be Done

I call John and tell him I think I can make it...I mean I need to be somewhere that takes a little over three hours to get to, and I need to be there in a little over two (parking, check in, security) so I tell him and the boys to think Jerry Reed! This is John Phillips, this isn't one of the best friends I've ever had...this is one of the best friends I will ever have and by God I will be there.

We've got a long way to go, and a short time to get there

So its about 8:05 or so when I hit the road. It takes me a bit to get to I-10 from the airport, but I feel I can make up some time on the big road. I do a little math in my head and think that if I average 80 miles an hour, then I will be there in time to make the flight.

Keep your foot hard on the pedal....son, never mind them brakes.....
Let it all hang out 'cause we've got a run to make

So I stake the pedal and hit the road...I've slept about and hour and a half since the night before and I'm ready to rock. I'd love to have a wild police chase story, but there's not much. I'm actually going to leave out the details of how fast and what kind of moves I had to make to get to Houston on time, because I fear incriminating myself. Let's just say that I don't normally drive this way.

So, you gotta' dodge him, you gotta' duck him
you gotta' keep that diesel truckin'
just put that hammer down and give it hell

As I said before, I left SA at 8 or so and was headed to Houston to hop a flight that was set to leave at 11:45. I entered Bush Intercontinental at around 10:55...my tires were squealing as I slid into a top floor parking spot...a Continental Kiosk met me at the C terminal's front door (oh man, I left out part of the story. I was checking flight status by phone, but they never could confirm the terminal...my heart told me C, although it could have very well have been B, which is the one I flew back into today) I had a ticket in hand and my carry on luggage at the security check point at 11:05 and at 11:15 I was sitting on Continental flight 127, a 737 out of gate C-40, waiting to taxi out and head to New Mexico.

I promise to fill you all in a little better on the United/Continental story. I just don't want to waste the rage I feel in a blog, and then have vented before I can tear in to the United people tomorrow.

I hit the ground running. John's brother-in-law, Stephen, plays the part of Hero by driving the 60 miles (give or take...you check map quest...I don't want to... www.mapquest.com ) to load me up and take me back to a throw on a tux and shave off some facial hair. You see I hadn't bothered to shave before I left..because I was supposed to arrive in Albuquerque at 9:27 that morning...but at 9:27 I was tearing up the black-top going East so that I might make it out West for a wedding.

We make it and I'm at the church on time. (talk about anti-climactic!)

The story might end here...it's late (again)...I can't sleep (again)...and there's more...but I just have to get to work on my e-mail to whoever can fire the President of United Airlines. That's whom I want to talk to.

I can say quickly that the wedding was beautiful. It was one of the best services I have ever been any kind of part of. John's wife is absolutely beautiful. I had a conversation on Saturday with a member of the wedding party as we walked to our hotel. We talked about how beauty is much more than the physical attraction. Personality and spirit may not weigh as heavy at first encounter, but soon take a larger place in the overall attractiveness of anyone. With that being said...John's wife, Cairy, is absolutely beautiful. As for John...well...just kidding.

Beautiful is the word of the day I guess...the Wedding was beautiful, the church was beautiful... www.lorettochapel.com the bridesmaids were beautiful...wait a minute...did I write that...and the town of Santa Fe is...well...you know...

As for me? Well, you could round my travels out to about 2000 miles, I've slept about 16 hours since Wednesday morning, and although it wouldn't be my first choice in route...I'd do it all again!

Congratulations to John and Cairy Phillips. May their love live as long as the sun, and die the day after eternity.

Oh, and my shamelessness seems to have lost all boundaries. The last minute ticket and the gas money to Houston have really left me a little light in the pocket book. That's why you all should go to www.lonestarmusic.com or www.texaswettnex.com or www.myspace.com/thetexaswettnex and buy a cd. I also have shirts and koozies, which I'll sell you direct. Hit me up at michael@texaswettnex.com or better yet come to the Tavern in the Gruene on Thursday night ( http://www.taverninthegruene.com ) or Riley's Tavern (www.rileystavern.com) on Monday to catch a show and buy some stuff. Even if you don't buy anything, come out and enjoy the music!

No one can ever take music away from me! It's always in my head. My bank account can run dry, my home destroyed, my legs chopped off (that would suck!) but as long as I breathe, there is music in my head! Come hear the music.

I don't know...

2006-05-18T01:22:00.000-05:00

I really don't have a "hot" topic...I just feel like typing I guess.

The Mavericks lost...that sucks...but game 6 is in Big D and I'm thinking that the Spurs are D-U-N. (that's done folks)

I'm headed out to Santa Fe Friday Morning. Going to go watch another one of the guys tie the knot. For those of us who are holding out, the numbers are getting pretty slim. Of the people who I really consider my "best of friends" there are only a couple of us left. With every wedding there is a closing of a chapter of my life (I'm not trying to be selfish here, I should say a closing of a chapter in our lives). The stories that I can no longer tell. When the two Erics went down...that was a couple of good chapters that I had to lock up...but now Johnny B...now our stories were the stuff that they make movies out of.

I'll grow up someday.

What else? Anyone feeling political? What do I think about the National Guard on the borders? I think if I were a citizen of Laredo, Texas I'd sure as hell support this move. They don't even have a police chief down there...no one is stupid enough to take it. If you feel that all is lost, and you just can't make it here anymore...well then get down to Laredo and take a police job...you won't last long.

All the debate...who's right? I can't decide who's right. Do I believe that this is a land of opportunity? Do I believe that my opportunity is being taken by someone who is not a U.S. Citizen? I remember one time when I almost didn't make it back across the border from Mexico because I was too drunk to say U.S. Citizen! Do I believe that if I turn my back on immigrants that I'd be turning my back on Jesus? Do I believe that immigration actually helps the economy? I do believe that I wouldn't dig a ditch for less than minimum wage, and that some people will...and I know that I hate paying taxes, but I think that if I have to, that anyone else who lives in this country should have to as well. I believe that if there was no immigration, that I would not be here today. I don't know what else...

Is President Bush a moron? Well hell no he's not a moron, if he were a moron than he wouldn't be President. If he is indeed a moron, then all of us are morons as well, since we did elect him (twice) to be our President. If you want to try to say that you are not a moron because you didn't vote for him, well guess what, you were then defeated by morons...which makes you lower than the moron...fight that battle if you want to. Do I agree with everything he does? Well hell no. I also don't agree with every decision that my bosses at work make...but they are the bosses.

My conscience tells me to stop, but since when do I listen to that mean bit...

I think the main problem with this war is that people don't understand what war is anymore...we're too busy trying to be gentleman again. You see the movies about the old ways. A bunch of men line up, take turns shooting each other...Gentlemen...bullshit...I'd rather be the police chief down in Laredo! I hear talk of these evil insurgent ambushes and road mines and such. Let me tell you this, I do not side with the insurgents...but I do understand their ways. David did not walk up and trade blows with Goliath...he hit him with a rock from a good distance away. He wasn't a moron! I think that our Shock and Awe strategy was a hell of an idea...right up to the point where we told the media what we were doing. I keep saying we, like I'm a fucking four star general...anyway, Shock and Awe was good...get in there...hit them every which way you can without them ever knowing...and to the victor goes the spoils. Or should I say oil? Your damn right this war has something to do with oil. We are a country hooked on oil like a crazy crack whore, and the middle east is sitting on the stash baby. I'm not saying that its the only reason...

I break to clear my head, not to change subjects...so anyway, we are fighting this war with the press in the front seat of our tanks and humvees. Send big brother home...send the tattle tale down the street home...send the close to the action problem starter home and whip a little ass. I know, I know...it sounds like the barbaric redneck thing to do...well, you're right. We are nuts deep in this war, and there doesn't look to be a miracle way out. I've been around barbaric rednecks my entire life..and there is only one thing that can down a barbaric redneck..and that's a bigger and badder barbaric redneck. Last I heard we were (I keep using this we...I mean America I guess) a superpower. We need to quit looking down at whose toes we might step on, and look up and hit someone in the jaw. Sometimes a little violence (I say a little as in a whole bunch) is the answer to peace. You should reference a Kenny Rogers song (oh shit, did I really just say reference Kenny Rogers?) the coward of the County. Sometimes you have to fight to be a man.

Speaking of songs...I love the new Dixie Chicks song! I love the music, I love the groove, and yes I love the words. I love the message. I don't know the song well enough, but the lyrics go something like - I made my bed and I sleep like a baby - which is one of the greatest lines I've ever heard. So, I'll tell you that I don't agree completely with what Natalie Maines said several years ago...she broke an unspoken rule, but she didn't do it with malice in her heart I don't think. See, as Americans we've all been taught that we have freedom of speech and all that good stuff...but the unspoken rule is that you don't condemn your own quarterback in front of the other team. Surely all of you have been on some kind of team...whether it be football, or debate, or chess or whatever...well you should know that you can talk about whatever you want in your locker room, but you never show any kind of disrespect to your teammates in front of the other team...especially the quarterback! She might have done that...but I am willing to bet that people who condemned her some years back, agree with her now...that is why W. has a pretty dismal job rating polls. This song is beautiful, and its beautiful because its true...and these very talented girls stick to their guns. Its one thing to go out and say something...its another thing to back it all up. I respect that.

Let's talk about something a little less errr.....

Am I really bipolar (I've been asked this alot lately) well...not according to Tom Cruise!

I know there was something else I was wanting to rant about...I just can't remember what it was now. I do love Keystone light.

I got the babies up and moving around tonight...I'm going to post some pictures soon...whenever I get back from Santa Fe...hoping that you can give the little tangs a home.
I hope I haven't offended anyone...actually I don't really care that much...but I do want you to feel free to drop me a line and straighten me out at anytime.

For those of you who like the political topic, you should check out the song, "The Wordsmith" at www.myspace.com/thetexaswettnex I didn't write it, Phillip Foster did, but I am singing it and it takes on a few political issues that some of you might be interested in. Go buy our CD! www.texaswettnex.com

a cada su propio

in my opinion...

2006-05-06T05:21:00.000-05:00

I've been asked several times lately about my opinion on certain "hot" topics in the world today. See I'm at a point in my life where many of you are, or a lot of you have already been. I'm on the ass end of 27, and although I'm still holding on to my rock-star dreams, I am beginning to pay a little more attention on the world outside mine.

I guess you would call this an exciting time in life...but I'm not sure that's exactly how I want to put it. It's definitely a time full of change and growth. This is the time (or maybe I'm a little behind) where you start to question. You start to question your beliefs and the beliefs of others. It's a time where you start to want to be more involved or at least more understanding of the things that drive your world.

So I'm going through this now...especially with politics and the moral issues that are constantly being ground down by the news media. So I guess this is why some people who are going through the same as me want to know my thoughts.

Personally I don't know why anyone would want to know, considering its 5:30 in the morning and I just finished my first beer of the day. Ha ha, its not exactly like that...you see I'm cooking a brisket for a little get together today and there is a law in Texas where its highly illegal to cook any kind of food in a bbq pit without having alcohol in your system. I don't know exactly where it is in the papers, but it's close to the top. Its also almost impossible to get a good fire going in the smoke box without holding an open container. I don't know why it is; it's just the way. To further lessen the value of my opinion, you should know that for the last hour I've been standing out in my back yard in shorts (no shirt) and a pair of boots trying to get my fire right. Its been raining cats and dogs for the last few hours...turns out that lightning can light up the whole world and likes to do so when you're standing in your back yard in shorts and a pair of boots while there are cars driving by.

Back to my opinion.

In my mind it's really hard to form a good opinion. I don't mean good as in right or wrong, but more just one that is based on all the correct information. When you're talking about political issues, it's hard just to go find facts and then form an opinion on them. The "facts" that you are getting through newspapers, or TV, or web pages, are really nothing more than the opinions of the entity and the person that is shares it with you. I try to take all that into consideration when forming any kind of opinion on almost anything.

Disclaimer: these opinions may change at any moment...whether it be up swing, or down swing, or just a change in wind direction. That's the great thing about opinions, is that they are not set in stone.

First the Moussaoui sentencing. I think that the right thing was done by not giving him the death penalty. Now don't get me wrong, the man deserves to die. They should have just brought him down here to Texas for the hearing. I'd have had it all over in a few minutes...I'd have tied him to a good strong horse and pulled his ass through a cactus patch, and that's what I'd do while I was deciding on a good sentence for him. To steal a line from an old Pace Picante commercial, "Partner, get a rope!" But that is what you do out of anger and loathing.

The thing about being confined is that you have nothing but time to think. Thinking is one of the most beautiful and one of the most agonizing things that a human does. Now this man is going to have years to be distressed by his own mind. He's going to question himself, his beliefs, his motives, and most importantly his demise. He's going to have time to sit and think...and when you're at the bottom, sitting and thinking can be very very painful.

This is of course not counting that we might just say he's in a prison in Colorado somewhere, and we take him to a desert in Arizona and beat the shit out of him and leave him for the buzzards.

I also have an opinion on this guys mother...she's mad at France for not taking up for her son. She's playing the race card, and saying that it is his color and beliefs that he was sentenced on and not his actions. Well the man stood up in court and mocked the dying voices of people who were innocently killed...she should visit Arizona as well. I'm all for punishing people according to the crime they commit...I say strap him to the front of an airplane and crash it into something...No, I say let this guy drive himself crazy. The jury did right...killing this man would never punish him for the crimes that he has committed, or the ones that he wanted to commit...make this man live...make him live where he is nothing, has nothing, and will never have nothing...nothing but his thoughts that will forsake him.

I'm going to stop there...I need to go check my fire...and its too early to give you my take on immigration...my heart and mind disagree so I need to work that out. Plus it's early and I might drink one more beer and then take a little cat nap.

Good Morning!

p.s. when cooking brisket and writing blogs at the same time, you should be very careful not to cut up Jalepenos and then touch your lips and eyes while proofreading...BEER ME!

Here Kitty Kitty...

2006-05-03T08:23:00.000-05:00

Here Kitty Kitty...
A few months back a friend of mine came down to San Marcos and we were out at Lake Dunlap in New Braunfels having a few beers and drownding a couple of minnows at a friends house. There really hasn't been much winter here in Texas, so it was at a point where it felt really great outside and I had been leaving the back door open to let the cool, fresh air in. So we get back to my house that night and my buddy looks into my room and asks me, "Hey, when did you get a
cat?"

I didn't have a cat.

"I don't have a cat!" but there it was...rolled up in a little ball in the middle of my bed.
The funny thing here was that I had been joking to my roommate that I was going to get a cat. So, since this cat was in the house I decided not to kick it out and tell him that we got one. The joke went on for a couple days and then it was time to get rid of the cat.

"Out of the house you cat!" as I tossed her out the back door, but she just kept hanging around and kept hanging around. She was so skinny and I started feeling sorry for her, so one night I fed her some tuna at the very back of the yard. This was not going to be an inside cat. I gave her some water outside, and eventually started feeding her in the little store room outside.

Occasionally I would let her in the house...she's super affectionate and really a pretty good kitty, as far as good kitties go, and she somehow even ended up sleeping in my bed on cold nights.

This had to stop! I didn't want this cat sleeping in my bed or my house, but evidently I'm one of those "nice drunks" who would let her in on the nights I decided to have a few.

Once she got named I should have known it was over...her name is Poon Tang most of the time...sometimes she gets called Ms. Kitty...and now she gets called...I'll get right back to that.

So anyway, Poon Tang starts to gain a little weight. She looks like more than a thin little sack of kitty bones. So much weight that I decided Ms. Kitty has been "catting around". She never really got super huge like I've seen cats get, so I couldn't ever tell if my assumption was entirely correct.

The other day, after being out of town on a business trip, I notice the cat has lost a lot of weight. I also notice that she is meowing a lot more (something she never did before) and the big kicker was that she sometimes had a problem being indoors. She never had that problem. I put two and two together and went snooping for the litter.

Well I found them....out in a box in the little storage shed lay two little Poon Tangs...they look just like her and the sneaky neighborhood cat that makes his way around my little part of town.

Crap!

I decided that the kittens had a pretty good set up out in the shed. There were protected, they had a good box, they were high enough off the ground not to be prey to something that couldn't climb, and Ms. Kitty was pretty good about sticking around them.

"If they make it, they make it.", I tell myself and I go back in the house. I wasn't trying to be cruel, but I just can't have all these cats in my house.

Then one day at lunch I came home and left the back door open for a while. I notice something out of the corner of my eye..."SMUGGLER!"...yep, Ms. Kitty was smuggling in one of her little ones. I chased her into a corner...looked pretty funny me chasing the cat that is carrying a kitten in her mouth. She put the kitten down and then went into a defensive ball around it...Son-of-a...well, I don't know what came over me...but I started to worry about that other kitten outside. I went out there to check on it...thought maybe it was dead and that's why she abandoned it. I took a look, and it was fine. So I figured that I might as well bring it in too...didn't want to leave it out there. I turned around and Poon Tang stood there, she must've known I was after the other one. She kind of got defensive, so I put the little kitten down and let her bring it into the house too. I guess I just wanted to make her feel like she was the protector.

The cats now sleep in a corner of my room on an old bed sheet. They've just started to open their eyes, but are not very mobile. Momma Kitty (which is her newest name) stays with them most of the time, but she will leave to roam every now and again.

As for me, I'm just a sucker sometimes...but I swear...when they get big enough to leave Momma Kitty...they're gone. So if any of you would like to make a nice home for some very cute little kittens (and Poon Tang too!) then let me know. They're free to a good home!

I need a hobby or something! Oh yeah, I've got one...www.texaswettnex.com...

Oil and stuff

2006-05-03T08:19:00.000-05:00

So last weekend I made a little venture north to see my brother Sam, if there are any of you looking for a home up around Ft. Worth, you should look him up at http://www.itsclosingtime.com/.

So anyway I was headed up there...was a little low in the tank...and had to fill up. Now there is a spot on the 35 Corridor just south of Waco that always has cheaper gas than most. I saw the $2.79 a gallon here in San Marcos and thought Hey, its gotta be a bit cheaper there. So I put 30 bucks in my tank and headed north. Got to my spot, and it was $2.85. Shit! So I kept a truckin. I was sure that it would get cheaper as I went. Well, I made it to North Cow Town and the gas was at $2.95 Shit! and I was out of gas. I had to put another 30 bucks in and this time I got less.

Now I had this whole spill all thought out, but I'm now worked up and I need to make my point.

Most of you have seen that oil companies are making record profits and taking over as the top companies in the world. They pushed out Wal-Mart...give me a breakWal-Mart? I hate the things behind Wal-Mart almost as much as I do the things behind the record oil profits (or I used to) but how does an oil company bump Wal-Mart? You can buy everything at Wal-Mart...everything! You can buy low margin items, you can buy high margin items, you can buy beer, baby wipes, jewelry, medicine, food, clothes...and on and on...and at your nearest Exxon you buy gas and a free car wash!

As we talk of things I hate, well I hate politics, but I now say that you need to contact the dirty bastards. You need to find out who your representative is and you need to call him. You need to tell him (or her, sorry) that you are unhappy with what is going on. You need to tell him that you vote. You need to tell him that you vote based on things that are going on in your world. You need to tell him that unless he and his peers dont start to really begin to take on these matters of gas prices, that you will find someone who will. If you are too damn lazy to find out whom your rep is, you send me a message and I will do it for you. These people work for you...they don't always have your best interest in mind, but they take that office making you believe that they do. You need to tell them that they need to make you believe!

I know that all of you get e-mails and coffee shop (or bar) conversation about how to stand up to the oil companies. Well I'm telling you how to do it the best way. No one will ever really boycott Conoco completely. We need gas and they know that. But we can hit them in a place where they must comply. When a National League baseball team is tied in the bottom of the ninth, with the bases loaded and two outs, and there Ace pitcher is up to bat...they don't leave that pitcher in...they put the best hitter they have available up there. The best hitters we have are our state and national representativesand we need to pencil them in.

When the gas prices drop to $2.50, well all be happy again...and we shouldn't. We need to refuse to be happy until what is right again, is right again.
Thats it...I'm tired of thinking about this.

Stupid!

2006-04-21T07:15:00.000-05:00

Sometimes Stupid isn't what you think it is. Sometimes its nothing at all. Sometimes its someone or something...or sometimes its nothing. Somtimes its a feeling or sometimes its what fills the void where feeling should be.

So here I sit stupid...wondering where you are. Wondering where I've sent you to. Some stupid place. Sometimes I remember the the stupid things we did and the stupid way you made me feel and I wonder why I was so stupid to send it all away. Or was it stupid of me to think it would ever be. Sometims I just wish the stupid world would give someone a stupid chance. Maybe I just wish I could give this stupid world a chance.

Maybe, I just wish this world wasn't so stupid.

I strongly believe that this stupid world let me be happy for the first time in a long tome to show me how crazy-stupid I could be. It drew the happiness out to expose the stupidness...and prevailed...and I'm so stupid I let it overcome me...but I can only be so stupid for so long.

At some point you have to shut up and take back your stupid life.

Is there a chance to say, "Hey, this was all stupid...let's do it another way"? Well let's do it another way.

Sleep is stupid. Why does sleep come for me at its whim? Why can't I control sleep? Sleep is stupid too! Can't I control all things stupid? Does stupid control me? Or does stupid just trick me? Stupid control! Stupid Sleep! Stupid Dreams! Stupid Stupid!

And your the only one that ever made me feel this way...so stupid...what do you have?

What do you have?

I know....but is it so stupid? Am I just stupid? And when did Stupid start trying to be a good thing?

Are there stupid heroes?

Are there stupid saints?

Am I so stupid?

Do I really feel this stupid way about you? Will you ever feel that stupid way about me? Did you ever? Will you again?

If you do...and if I do...will this stupid world ever give us a chance? Is there a chance? Is it a stupid chance or a stupid chance?

Do I want a chance?

Do you?

Or is this all just really stupid?

Stupid heart
Stupid brain
stupid love
stupid sleep
stupid fears
stupid tears
stupid me!

Whose fault it is....

2006-04-14T17:29:00.000-05:00

Disclaimer: I have been feeling a little delusional lately

I got measured for my good buddy John’s wedding next month…turns out I’m going to be in the wedding and that I’m even bigger around than I thought I was. Now I’m on fire to go on a diet and really crank up the exercise program, but I can’t…you see then my tux wouldn’t fit and I’d ruin the whole wedding. I’d be standing up there…the pants would fall off…the women would faint…the men would cry…so I just can’t be exercising. Of course I can’t consume more daily than I have of late (as if that is freaking possible) because then the tux would be too small…guess I’m going to have to watch my figure! Therefore its John’s fault that I can’t lose weight!

Or!

I had a conversation with another one of my friend’s recently. We were talking about getting older and more out of shape and stuff…and how everyone seems to be packing it on. Anyway, the conversation turned to eating out, and how it’s a common misconception that you have to eat everything on the plate at a restaurant. His comment was something like, “The restaurants don’t know how much you need to eat, you shouldn’t eat it all” Which goes against the idea of getting your money’s worth, or more importantly your Mother’s demands of cleaning your plate before you can go out to play.

Ah, so we can’t blame it on the restaurant because they can’t know each and every patron, but we can blame it on our Mother! Mother knows best, and mother says clean your plate or you can’t go out and play. Maybe we do blame it on the restaurants for taking advantage of our mother’s philosophy to fatten us all up.

I have to get off subject here for a second…Do any of you guys remember having to wait thirty minutes after you ate to go swimming? I had to do this…I hated it…I love the water and I’d have rather swam than ate. But no, I had to go eat and make sure I cleaned my whole plate and then wait thirty minutes before I got back in the water! Turns out that is just an old wives tale, and kids these days can just eat and go. Bullshit! I feel as though I have been cheated out of days of my life! Days??? Maybe weeks…maybe months! I was cheated!

So anyway, I’m trying to figure out whose fault it is that I’m in this current shape…is it John? Is it my Mother? Is it an evil ploy by Taqueria Jalisco.

Then someone suggested that I may be in this shape due to the amount of beer I drink…Not So Fast. That if I were to quit drinking I’d automatically be in better shape. Well, I believe that you can do anything in moderation…but due to the fact that my Mother always taught me to clean my plate, and that the restaurants put so much food on the plate, I now eat more…and eating more causes me to have to drink more…due to extra weight as well as having stuff in my stomach to absorb the alcohol. We all know that if you don’t eat, you can’t drink as much. So it can’t be the beer’s fault, because even though alcohol is fattening, if it weren’t for the food I wouldn’t drink near as much.

I guess we can point fingers at who we may, but at the bottom line we have to blame it on Mom…who made me wait thirty minutes before I swam (and therefore waited thirty minutes before I could burn calories) and made sure I cleaned my plate (before I could go play and burn more calories).

Of course I jest. I know its not my mother’s fault that I’m fattening up. There is only one man to blame…one man who is over consumptive…one man who seems to be more and more sedentary…one man….yep, you guessed it…its still John’s fault!

Billy Blanks is trying to kill me....

2006-04-07T16:55:00.000-05:00

and I'm letting him in the door.

So, thanks to my growing concern over the shape that I'm in...round...I've decided to start eating better, not drinking so much beer, and trying to work out a little bit. I've also started drinking more and more water everyday, but still dont' sleep a whole lot...Rhome, TX was not built in a day.

So all the basic ingredients of weight loss...eat right, drink lots of water, exercise, and get plenty of rest...almost all...plus the desire to slim down; and you have got a man on a mission. So here I go! Time warp, back about 6 months ago, I'm lying in bed and thinking to myself, "Self, you are getting really fat and you need to lose some weight!" It just so happened I'm awake at some point in the night, and there are infomericals on...Billy f'in Blanks...and Billy is Boot Campin' himself and a bunch of women straining to keep smiles on their faces right in to faboulous shape. I mean the pictures don't lie...the results are there. I'm thinking, "this I can do...it's not weights, it's not pilates, this is a big damn man and I can do this."

So I ordered the tapes, they came in a couple of weeks later, and one of the three still has the plastic on it. Anyway, I guess I lost my late night inspiration for a few inches to the waist line, and I left Billy just lying around...I think he started to put on some weight living in this house without working out.

Back to now...So recently I have decided that I've put on way too much weight and I need to work some of this shit off. Turns out sitting around, drinking beer, and strumming guitars does not burn a whole lot of calories...my diet plan didn't work...you won't see me on late night/early morning informercials! I pulled old Billy Blanks out the box, and popped him in the DVD player...and then I sat there and laughed, and laughed some more, and then I just grabbed me a beer and sat on the couch and watched. "There a'int no way I'm going to be caught dead doing that shit and counting Billy!" I just a'int doing it! Another 1/2 inch or so, and I pulled old Billy back out. "I can do this!!!" but no, I just stood in my living room, decked out in my workout clothes, and thinking, "What if someone saw me???"

A few days ago my fat pants quit fitting...that a'int funny. Last night I pulled Billy out..."This is your last chance Billy...don't make me go Chuck Norris on your ass!" Although it took me a few minutes, I started doing what the Billy was a doing...then a few minutes later I started sweating...a few more minutes and I can feel the burn that he's talking about...

For those of you who are sitting there picturing me doing this and laughing, hey man, do a couple of minutes of this tape in my shoes...I bet you're breathing too damn hard to laugh...

Anyway, so I tell my out-of-shape self, "out-of-shape self, you're going to make it at least 30 minutes!" and I did! I might have slowed down a little, or missed a rep or two, but for the most part I did it...and then I quit...at 30 minutes and .2322132 seconds. Walked around a bit, drank a little water, wiped my forehead, you know...post-exercise stuff. Then I got that feeling. You know that feeling after a good workout, or run, etc. where you feel like you can do one more set, or run one more lap...yep I got it...and then it went away...and I stood (slumped) there in my kitchen...wishing I could muster up the strength to lift the glass of water to my face, or atleast find a straw. Yep, Billy Blanks had kicked me square in the you-are-one-out-of-shape-little-butterball button. And so we get to this today...Billy Blanks was trying to kill me. I just finished my second night of half an hour with Billy Blanks...and yep...he definitely wants me in the best shape of my life...or he wants someone to find me lying face first on the living room floor, tied up with my own with Billy Bands. I think I'm going to make it...if you drink you a little Canadian Mist and Water you feel better, and you write a horrible blog. That's what I always say!

Anyway, good night to you all...I'm going to roll (literally, I can't walk) into the living room and watch some Billy Blanks.

hmmm?

2006-04-06T00:34:00.000-05:00

Hello Kids,

it's 11:40 and I'm not asleep...this may not seem strange to some of you, but if you knew how little sleep I have really gotten in the last 5 days or so, and how tired I always think I am when I get off work, then you'd know why I'm upset that I'm still awake. Not only am I awake, but I think I just got my 42nd wind.

For my friends and family who read this blog, I don't want you worrying about me...trust me...only 3/4 of what I say is true.

for everyone else...How the hell are you...I promise at least 3/4 of this is true.

So, I haven't been sleeping much...but that happens from time to time. It actually goes from not sleeping much, to not sleeping at all, but that's a whole other story. I was prescribed Ambien for a little while, and I actually do have some of those "sleep-eating" stories that were flooding the news a few weeks ago. I once got up and made a fried egg sandwich (yeah, that doesn't sound good). Not only did I make it, but I ate it, washed the dishes, and then went back to bed. I also had a night where I decided I wanted spaghetti, and somehow the Ambien thought that whole kernel corn would give it a little extra flavor that it hadn't had before...I love that Ambien!

So I hardly ever write without a point, and I'm finding that I can't remember what my point was tonight.

Hmm???? I am a little bit excited about having my first ever CD release party tomorrow night. Its at Riley's Tavern in Hunter, TX http://www.rileystavern.com/ and hoping that it all goes well. I also heard my self singing on the radio earlier...that was cool.

What else??? I have found recently that I have become way more interested in current events, and politics, and economics than I have been in the past. It could be from growing up, or more mature (I really hope not) or maybe I'm just tired of having my head in the sand. I used to read every sports headline in the country, trying to keep up with stats and schedules, as well as who was playing the next night. Here lately I find myself checking more headlines than normal, and always stopping on the ones that have a little more "grown up" content. Of course I take all articles as a grain of salt. Articles are much like surveys or studies, you really have to look who's behind them before you take their findings into too much consideration. Myself, I'm neither Democrat or Republican. I don't much like either party. I'm wondering why it is that the well being of the political party outweighs the well being of the nation. You may say that the two lie hand in hand, but which party are you getting your information from?

So what's happening in politics right now? Well, John Mc Cain threatened to walk off stage at a speech. Now, I will tell you that I have the utmost respect for Senator Mc Cain. He was a POW, and if you have never read or heard what these people went through you should take a long, hard look at it. I don't care if some of you think that he might have embellished his hero status a bit...a person who made it out of a POW camp was not someone who came out of Club Med. But back to the speech thing, Senator John Mc Cain threatened earlier this week to walk off stage after being booed, basically, and I think this is a bunch of crap. People with a conscience, not people like me, may see where this was a delicate situation. If there would have been 200 Michael Wrens in the room, we'd have booed his ass smooth off the stage. Not because I would agree of disagree with the Senator's beliefs, but that I do believe in some small North Texas town beliefs of "you better show up before you bow up". If you don't want to take the heat (that you are paid very well to take) and threaten to walk off the stage, then walk your ass off the stage and see where you public approval poll stands. To me, this gesture was nothing more than a "bob and weave" that came fairly close to "taking a dive".

More politics...kind of....the Homeland Security dude that got busted trying to solicit a minor...Hang Him...let me quote one of my favorite books ever (Lonesome Dove...) "...Shot 'em, now I'm gonna hang 'em, then I'm gonna burn 'em!..." Folks, I've done some bad shit in my life, but nothing like this dude. I'm not saying any more. Damn Sodbusters.I don't know why I talk politics, because I have no agenda. I hate 'em all...they're all crooked. If you think that your representative a'int crooked...well maybe he's not....but give him some time...its the company you keep.

Oh, I did forget the big scandal with the U.S. Capitol police offer and Cynthia McKinney...what the hell? WEAR THE LAPEL PIN! These folks have it pretty damn good...congress folk I'm saying...they're given their official identification, but to make it easier all they have to wear is a damn lapel pin...she's lucky she's not serving down here in Texas...those boys would have tasered her ass! Some really bad guys flew some planes into the World Trade Center and killed a bunch of people...I've not forgotten...if you cared about your constituency...wear your f'ing pin with pride. We want a safer America, even if the whole world is supposed to know who we are no matter what our manner of dress or new hairdo.

I'm just rambling!

I've got more to say, but it'll get way off subject...you guys should come to Riley's tomorrow night...buy a CD....and a shirt...got to http://www.texaswettnex.com/ or http://www.lonestarmusic.com/ or www.myspace.com/thetexaswettnex and find out who we are.
rock on...we'll see you then

dangit!

2006-03-31T00:40:00.000-06:00

I just want to apologize for just being down on things so much lately...seems all I do is bitch, bitch, bitch...

I went to watch some friends of mine, The Joel Hoffman Band, play some music tonight... and man I had a great time. They're a rockabilly band that plays mostly covers, but man I caught myself just smiling tonight. For no apparent reason I was smiling, and it was because the music...that's the sign of a good set by a good band. Thinking music sounds good is one thing, but when music touches you emotionally...that is when its spiritual.

Anyway, I grew up on old country music...I used to sit around with these old 70's earphones on, you know the ones that looked like Princess Leigha's bun hair do, and my siblings would have their fun by turning up the music gradually and listening to me gradually singing louder and louder. Such amusement is how you get by in small North Texas towns. I kept listening through those ear phones. When my friends were getting cassette set singles of the next big thing, I was spinning vinyl records...Hank Williams 48 greatest hits, this was and may still be my favorite album of all time. I had never even loved before, and I knew every word to Your Cheating Heart...an Omen for sure. My first drunk was the 5th grade...shooting Crown Royal and listening to Hank Williams...that's how you grow a Country Singer right there.

If you listen to the aforementioned Hank Williams album, and I do suggest you do, you'll hear some of the greatest songs ever written, performed, or recorded. Something else you will hear is simplicity. I'm not saying that the musicians on the album weren't talented, they were for sure, but I am saying that the message was what was important. These days you hear reverb, and feed back, and distortion...something to make a sound...but these things weren't what made the music back then. I guess advances in technology, as well as the learning curve of modern musicians, has given us the ability to make sounds that were implausible at the time...but today's music isn't any better than what you'll get on that two record set from Hank Williams. We're getting more and more and more technically advanced. With every facet of life we are continually finding new and better things. That doesn't mean that we are making life better.

To get off music for a while, let me tell you about something I was thinking about in my sleep this morning. I do think in my sleep...I have full blown conversations with myself while being completely unconcious. I know that many of you think that this is impossible, but its not and is probably the root of my sleep disorder. If you were to go buy Leaning In, the debut album by my band the Texas WettNex you would hear a song that I basically wrote while I was sleeping. Its called 14 Shots and is the last track on the album. I was asleep and talking the song out, and there were people here (it used to be a nonstop party) and I woke up and went out to the back porch, wrote down what I was thinking and hearing in my sleep, and was singing that song within 20 minutes of waking up. I have witnesses to attest to this.

Sorry, I got off subject.

Anyway I was sleep discussing this morning the effects of TiVo or DVR on modern television. I have a roommate now that works nights and often tapes shows that he likes and watches them during the day when there is nothing but crap on the tube. I know alot of people that record their favorite show, in one form or another, so that they can watch it at a more convenient time and be able to skip over the commercials.

I want you to think for a minute what effect this will eventually have on modern television.

Everyone can get three or four, and sometimes more, channels free on any television if they have an antenna. I used to watch NFL football every Sunday with my TV that I've had forever and a guitar string that I'd run up the window and wrap in the mini-blinds. I'm not kidding either...I even knew which row of blinds I'd have to move the wire to so that I might watch either the game on FOX or CBS. If you want guaranteed clarity, or a whole slew of other channels, you have to pay for Cable or Satellite TV. I want to drop my disclaimer here that I'm no scholar of Economics...I've never claimed to be the smartest guy in the world, but I do understand very basic supply and demand, and the price of goods and the price which they are sold. You see, the price of what you pay for your basic cable, or the stars package, or the whole kit and caboodle is based on many things, but one of those is advertising dollars. Everytime you see that little Geico lizard or a Budweiser Commercial or a spot for McDonalds, you are seeing money that those companies have paid the television networks to get their product in your living room. It has been a very effective method of advertisement for quite some time. Think about how many times you've seen a big ole Whataburger on your tube and thought to yourself, "Self, I'm hungry".

So now we have TiVo, and what we will soon have is an adverse effect on our cable rates. As more and more people "tape" their favorite shows so that they can skip over commercials, then commercials will lose their value. If I'm in charge of advertising at Toyota (possibly the best car or truck or 1981 LandCruiser that I regret selling every damn day) I no longer want to pay X amount of dollars for a commercial that is being skipped over by modern technology. To make it easy...If the Texas WettNex paid $10 dollars for their CD to be pushed to 1ooo people, well that would seem like a hell of a deal, but if we paid that same $10 and 250 of those people chose to skip over our ads...then we'd wonder if we might should only be paying $7.50.

I'm rambling, I know. Here is where I'm trying to go with this. Even though the DVR or TiVo system has made it easier for people to watch shows at a more convenient time, what it will also do is lessen the value of advertising. What it won't do is lessen the cost of producing your favorite television show...so when the advertisers demand to quit paying so much for their often skipped over messages, the cable providers are going to have to demand more money for their service. If there is less money coming in the back door, well we'll just have to pull in a little more at the front.

So, as you skip over Betty Crocker and the Pillsbury Doughboy while watching Oprah...are you making your life easier or more complicated? Are you saving yourself time, or are you costing yourself money?

Think back to when life was less complicated...and the little things made you smile.

eh

2006-03-30T09:27:00.000-06:00

I haven't much time to write tonight...I need to head up to the bar and play some music...its just that sometimes I get down and don't even know why...or maybe I do know why and just refuse to admit it.

I have, as I'm sure you have, used the word inevitable in a sentence atleast once in my life. You know what inevitable means probably. Its a great word because everyone knows what it means, but it still sounds fancy. I don't like inevitable right now...who chooses inevitable? If I tell you that its inevitable that someone fails because he's trying to start fire with water, I'm probably correct. What if he starts fire with water...what if he finds a way to spark flame with good ole H2O and all the sudden my statement is inevitably wrong. Who chooses what? Why are things inevitable? What is worth trying to change?

I have to be careful sometimes what I write on here because my motherreads these and she might read something and take it the wrong way, but its hard for me because I write my stuff, as well as live much of my life, with reckless abandonment. Therefore, the way I live and write, its inevitable that at some point I'm going to be taken out of context, or hurt someones feelings, or make someone angry.

If you live your life, or write your thoughts, or bake your cookies to make sure everyone is happy..then you are nothing. If you spend your time trying so hard to please others, then you are never yourself. Do you know who you are? Ask yourself that question right now. Do I really know who I am? Are you a different person at work then you are at home? Have you ever blamed something on the alcohol? I live by a little saying, "a drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts." If you act different in different environments, why do you do so? Now I'm not talking about little things that are out of respect...at home I cuss like a sailor...I try not to do that too much at work because people are offended by such things and I do work in the retail business. I try to keep many of my opinions to myself at work, although I would never state a false opinion just to appease someone.

There is the dude that comes in and tries to hammer on us and hammer on us for a lower price..."come on"..."give me a break"..."I know you have room to move" (like we don't have bills to pay?). This is the same guy that asks why everything is made in China, and I want so bad to come over the counter and give him a piece of my mind. "Its people like you that have driven everything to foreign countries...you, who wants to pay less and less for a product and the service that goes with it, all the time wanting more and more and more money to be paid for yourself!" I've seen myself scream this in my head. Its you Mr. Fatman who has to ask for a little less no matter what the price to the point that the only way I can get you what you ask for at the price you are willing to pay is to go somewhere where it can be made cheaper. A place where people work harder for less money.

Sorry about that, but if you couldn't tell I'm just a little upset and my mind is swirling. All this time I don't know if I'm upset at something, someone, or just my own damn self.
Why is it that we always seem chasing something or someone that we can't have...that doesn't want us...and all the time there is something that we don't want that is chasing us. Maybe its a great life back there, but you just keep pressing on...keep reaching....keep hoping.
Think outside the box...Its a vicious cycle...dont' be selfish and think about yourself...look at the broad picture. That someone or something that doesn't want you, is probably chasing someone or something else that doesn't want them. If you've never thought about that, then have you thought about this...that person who wants you or what you have, that you are running from...the person who would give you anything...there is someone chasing them. Someone who would gladly step in and give it all they have.

If you're confused then my job here is done...you feel like me and all I really wanted to do was to bring the whole damn lot down with me.
There are few things in this world that are truly inevitable...things that can't be changed no matter what you do. Success is not inevitable, no matter what you do. Love is not inevitable. But chasing success, and chasing love...there is an inevitability...you will hurt sometimes, not necessarily forever...but you will hurt sometimes. Without pain, would you ever really know pleasure?

If you read this in time to make it out to the Texas Sports Bar, tonight would be a good night...when I'm happy I play and have fun, but when I'm sad I pour my heart and pain out into the song...cause there never would have been any soul or rock and roll without the blues.

Oh Crap!

2006-03-23T19:14:00.000-06:00

My disclaimer here is that sometimes I just need to rant. Sometimes I can't quit until someone hears me, and often its too late; I've gone too far.

Its a scary thing saying what you believe sometimes. I've just released a CD, I should be trying to make friends with everyone I can. I believe when you say something you should stand behind it, right or wrong. I shouldn't go against any grain, I should roll with the flow and be everyones buddy.

That's not me.

Next let me tell you that I don't condone drunk driving. So when this is all over, don't take stabs at me for this. I don't think its good to drive when impaired for any reason. You ever tried to drive when you're real sick and the sun shines in just a bit and you can barely open your eyes? That's driving impaired.

So here it is.

We've all seen this picture of the beautiful young girl who was hit by a drunk driver and now lives life deformed. This is a horrible thing, I pray for that girl. We've all seen the stats on how many deaths each year are attributed to drunk driving accidents, and once again this is not good. But let me ask this...where are the stats for how many people are killed by stone sober drivers? Do you think its less or more? How many people are killed each year by drivers who are sleep deprived? This is probably more of a danger than drunk driving. How many people are killed each year by drivers on their cell phone, or putting on make up, or tying their shoes? Why aren't there commercials for this? How many people are killed each year by drivers under 18 or over 80? Why don't these stats ever show up on TV and Radio commercials? Why don't you hear the story about the highschool kid who was driving to see his girlfriend one morning and ended up dead and putting the guy he hit in a wheel chair? I didn't make that story up.

I'm not saying that we shouldn't warn of the dangers of drunk driving, I'm asking why you don't see the warning of careless driving in other forms. I for one would rather hitch a ride with some dude that just pounded a six pack after work, like he does everyday, than catch a ride with a 16 year old kid. For every person I know who was hurt or injured or killed in a drunk driving incident, (I was injured in a drunk driving incident) I know of a person who was killed in a accident that did not involve drugs or alcohol.

I had more wrecks (and I had a few) in my young driving days when I was sober than I did when I was drunk. Some would say that this is because I drove more sober than I did while drinking...well for those of you who ever drove much distance with me back in the AC days, you'll know that isn't exactly the case.

And there's M.A.D.D., and they are crusading all over the country, maybe the world for all I know, and speaking of the evils of drunk driving. Good for them, but why target drunks? Well obviously its because they lost someone or had someone close to them injured by someone drinking or while inebriated themselves. But why be so selfish...stay on your war path, but let's fight the whole lot. Don't be Mothers Against Drunk Drivers, be Mothers Against Debilitated Drivers. How about Mothers Against Developing Drivers? Mothers Against Dressing Drivers? Mothers Against Dialing Drivers? Mothers Against Decrepit Drivers?

You get the pictures?

Let's get all the dangers off the road. Let's go and tally up the stats. Let's see where the dangers really lie. Let's take anyone under 18 and anyone over 80 off the road. I guarantee that this would make the roads safer. Let's pass a law where you have to be completely clothed or bare-assed naked, and stay that way, to drive. Let's take cell phones out of the car (I wouldn't like that one). Let's pass laws for all drivers that are similar to the new laws for Truck Drivers. Each driver has to keep a log of how many hours they have spent on the road, and how much sleep they've had. The days of cheap amphetamines and truck stop coffee are over, for all of us.

Let us not continue to point out part of the problem, let's not pick on those people who are doing something we don't agree with because you can easily get the backing of a snooty society. If one Mad Mother rear ends someone while she's putting on her make up as she's late to work, then she is not better than Barney, more over she's worse. You want to save lives, then save all lives at all costs.

Check your stats folks, and then let's get this thing going.

By the way, this thing that is going around MySpace...the petition...at the bottom has this
"If you receive this petition and do nothing but delete it, your selfishness knows no bounds. Signing is such a small effort to make."

I did my part by sharing these views, but I have not signed your petition...I face my selfishness, you face your hipocrisy.

What's going on?

2006-03-18T14:25:00.000-06:00

This week started out good, by the WettNex finally getting their first CD and selling a few copies and sending them to radio stations, but man has it gone down hill since then. Let me note that my week is still in the positive, because it would take a whole dang lot to bring me down from the euphoria of getting the album. By the way, its titled Leaning In, and will be available via our web site very soon. http://www.texaswettnex.com/

Now let's talk about this other crap going on.

Politics:

I hate 'em. I don't like politicians, I don't like the games they play, and I don't like the lies they tell. I hate 'em

In the aftermath of hurricane Katrina we've seen much ineptitude at every level of government. They can point fingers at those higher or lower, but the bottom line is that none of them handled this storm or its aftermath correctly. Government officials claim that they didn't have all the information they needed to accurately and expertly manage the situation, but we've all seen that this simply wasn't true. We've seen the e-mails circulating through FEMA and its ex-executive Mike Brown during what should have been a time of urgency. We've seen the videos of President Bush being briefed on the catastrophe to come before Katrina made her landfall. We've all known that New Orleans was a city that would inevitably end up under water some day.

So let me take up for the government for a second. They've done wrong and there is no doubt about that, but the real blame here goes to arrogance and complacency. I guess you could say that they weren't really prepared for such destruction, because none of us had ever seen such. You ever seen a little kid who just has to try to touch something hot? Their mother repeatedly tells them to stop, to not do that, that's it hot and it will burn you, but they just keep trying to get their little hands on whatever it might be. Then they finally touch it, and they cry, and they look at their mom with tears in their eyes and pouting faces and then they don't ever touch it again. For some reason this goes on throughout our lives, our parents tell us stuff that is bad for us and we always think they know nothing until we end up with blisters on our hands. So, here are the leaders of the towns, cities, states, and this country who are fixing to go through something that they had never seen, well at least not of this magnitude, and they had to get burned before they understood what the experts were warning them of. How about the people who stayed in their homes to "ride out" the storm? Now these are the people who criticize the government and their handling of the storm. (the ones who aren't dead) I recently saw an interview of a man who miraculously made it through Katrina. His words were something like, "I've made it through all the other storms unscathed (yeah, he didn't say unscathed) but I've not seen anything like this before" and he went on to say that he would evacuate in the future and all that other stuff. I didn't mean to write this much about Government. The whole thing is, everybody from Shrimper Joe on the Louisiana coast to President Bush made a rash of bad decisions in this matter, and its mainly because despite all the expert information that was handed to them, they were not prepared for this magnitude of storm. And they were extremely arrogant!

The World Baseball Classic:

How could the United States team disappoint us like that? Why didn't they go and crush everyone? How could they lose to Canada? How could they lose to Korea? Well duh! Although the continent of North America does rule the baseball world, United States citizens do not rule baseball. I'm not saying that there aren't very talented American baseball players. My favorite baseball player, Michael Young, is American and played on the American team. My favorite team, the Texas Rangers, has a list of American all-stars. If you look at stat leaders you'll see a bunch of Americans, but not for long. If any of you are surprised that Cuba is playing in the finals, well you don't know much about baseball. Boys from Latin countries are taught baseball from birth. These kids treat baseball they way that lower class urbanites look at basketball. Its a way for them to get out of poverty, and away from crime (although many of them just take the crime with them), and out of the perception that they are nothing. Some Latin Americans are signed under contract as young as 15. The Texas Rangers, then owned by President Bush, signed Sammy Sosa when he was 16. You want to talk about another bad decision by Bush and company, they traded him to the White Sox during his first major league season. There was no way the American team had a chance. But they lost to Canada? I guess we know how they felt when we started beating them at hockey.

The Cowboys to sign T.O.???:

Say it a'int so! Now I'll admit that I had very similar sentiments when they signed Keyshawn Johnson. I thought he was a loud-mouthed crybaby who wasn't nearly as talented as he thought he was. It turned out that he did some really great things in Dallas. He was a dependable receiver in the clutch, he was a inspiration in the locker room, he really did some great things for the fans (I saw him give game balls to handicap children who were in the stands during games, that's good stuff) and he didn't whine too much. So now they're going to get Terrell Owens. What the....? He is a loud-mouthed crybaby, who may be every bit as talented as he says he is. He's capable of making huge plays, and swaying a game. I'd say he's good for a touchdown every game and a half, and he makes other receivers better because defenses have to concentrate on him so much. But he's a Cancer! He was a cancer in San Francisco, he was a cancer in Philly, and I'd bet my left shoe that he'll be a cancer in Dallas. My only hope is that he wants revenge on Philly so badly, that he straightens up for at least this one year and helps Dallas to a Division Title. Let us (loyal Cowboys fans) not forget that this is the guy who celebrated on our Blue Texas Star. There are many fans that hopped off the Cowboys bandwagon the day they fired Tom Landry, well I hope that the day they sign T.O. won't empty out a few more seats. I know Jerry is thinking that if T.O. helps the 'Boys win that title that all will be forgiven, but aye some things just can never be forgotten!

I'm sorry, I've just been listening to too many commentators this week I guess. I've read too many headlines, and thought too many thoughts. I hope all of you are having a great weekend, and I'll catch up with you soon.

Don't forget... http://www.texaswettnex.com/ and if you want to hear some song samples go to www.myspace.com/thetexaswettnex

Oh Come On Dude...

2006-03-14T12:14:00.000-06:00

The following came from the "Strange But True" section of aol news...read this and then answer my question at the bottom.

Man Says Stripper Delivered a Rob-O-Gram

ATASCADERO, Calif. (March 10) - A retired salesman alleged a stripper and her friend beat and robbed him in his home. John Skinner, 54, said he was on his way to Bible study on Jan. 23 when exotic dancer Maureen Murphy, 25, knocked on his door and offered him a free strip-o-gram.
Murphy said a friend had already paid for the show, police said.
When Skinner agreed to let her perform, knife wielding Richard Adam, 23, allegedly forced his way inside and told Skinner he owed Murphy, owner of Bikini Assassins, and another woman money for earlier services.
Skinner said he owed Talbert money for sex one time but not for a previous time when he said she fell asleep before they could have sex.
Adam allegedly tied up Skinner and hit him in the face. Investigators said Murphy went upstairs to find valuables and returned with thong underwear and medication for erectile dysfunction.
The pair allegedly tried to take Skinner's car, but it was out of gas.
Prosecutors charged three people in the case.
Adam was charged with robbery, burglary and inflicting great bodily injury. Exotic dancer Leslie Talbert, 20, was charged with two counts of burglary and Murphy, 25, was charged with robbery, burglary, false imprisonment and battery. A preliminary hearing will be held March 23.

Now do you really think that this guy was going to Bible Study????

By the way, you need to buy a Texas WettNex CD...Its hot off the press and going fast. www.texaswettnex.com or www.myspace.com/thetexaswettnex

So You're the One...

2006-03-08T19:21:00.000-06:00

I'm not going to waste either of our time trying to recall it, but there's an old Aggie Joke that's about an Aggie who's trying to row a boat in the middle of Kyle field because he thinks its water or something. The punch line is delivered from a fellow Aggie, "You idiot, its Aggies like you that give the rest of us a bad name...and if I could swim I'd come out there and kick your..."

Yeah, sometimes it just takes one person to label a whole group.

You hear all the time about the beautiful girls that hate being beautiful because all the guys are intimidated and won't hit on them...blah, blah, blah... Being a guy I know that I'm personally pretty damn intimidated a lot of the times, except of course after some liquid Love gets mixed with some diet Courage on the rocks and then Dr. Debonair comes out and trys out his best line, "Hey, youth soor look be-u-futil". Of course this is said a few decibels over the Heavy Metal band in the background while spitting all over your prospective companion. Works every time.

But fo sho', its not always easy being a guy and trying to talk to a woman...the rejection is painful. No one likes to be rejected, especially when they have their heart on their sleeve, or there willie out the....sorry.

Now I think that the majority of the people, or at least the female people, in this world are of good heart and wouldn't be overly rude to anyone unless it's absolutely necessary. But its the select few that ruin it for them. It's the select few from cultures, or races, or political party (well, its really most of them) or religion that do something depraved and its all too often the defining point of their troop.

Last night I'm playing shuffle board in this bar. I'm having a few drinks with some friends, some of them very nice girls, and trying to invite people to come out to Riley's and watch me play tonight. I'm just letting them know that the WettNex are going to be out in full force and ready to rock. I see these two girls sitting there drinking and talking, and with only the intention of asking them to come check out a show, I walk up and say hello.

The dialouge was close to this.

"Hello" (happy go lucky voice)

"Yeah" (mean nasty bitchy voice)

(I stop for a moment and think, what a...) "What are you girls doing tomorrow night"

"Its none of your business" (yeah, she really was...)

(I can see the ship sinking) "Well, I just wanted to invite you out to Riley's tomorrow night, my
band is playing and we'd like to see you there."

(extreme bitchiness...I know that I should change my descriptions, but what other way can you say this) "Well, I'll be with my 5 kids, can they come?"

Now, this girl was obviously not old enough to have 5 kids, but I hope that she does in the future...all at once...through her nose.

I want to say something like, "Yeah, you don't have to be a bitch...I'm not hitting on you...you're not that pretty" but instead I say, "Alright, great, well you have a good night"

So, here I sit...thinking that my approach of inviting girls to the show needs some work...although the few girls that I asked earlier in the night were real nice and I should probably have written about how nice they were, but what fun would that be.

But girls like these are the reason that insecure guys stand in the corner with their friends, ogling all who walk by, thinking about how they'd like to ..., and knocking back the courage. Waiting for the confidence to build up, and hoping it does so before they lose the ability to speak...or try to dance...or hold it 'til they make it to the boys room. Its tough being a guy.

I'm sure there is some quote about bad apples or something, but I don't think we need it.

I'm going to go play some music...Don't you wish you were going to be there?
http://www.texaswettnex.com/

Rocks

2006-03-07T14:21:00.000-06:00

The following comes from a June 2000 edition of the Archer County News. I once had a byline in my small hometown paper and they let me write worthless stuff every week. I don't even know exactly where I was emotionally when I wrote this, but I feel that it should be revisited...my grammar has not improved over the years so don't judge me there.

I’m not sick, hurt, dead or dismembered, nor have I been asked to quit, fired, or just quit on my own. Many people have asked why I haven’t been writing any lately so I thought I’d clear that up. I have just been busy here lately and had to put a few things on the back burner.

So anyway, I have a really good excuse for last week. You see it was my birthday, and I spent Monday and Tuesday celebrating. For any of you who can’t believe you missed it, send money. I can now look back on a full 22 years and wonder, “what the hell?”

I’ve never been the type to do a lot of planning. I pretty much just go with the moment, but like every other person in this world, I had some kind of dreams and aspirations as a little kid. If I think of the ideas from way back, I should have already been an astronaut by now. But, even though my life is about as far from the plans I made as a senior in High School as they can be, I’m happy with it. Why? Well, I finally think I know what I want to do, or be involved with, etc.

That’s not what I’m going to write about, though. I’m going to write about rocks. I remember this one time when I was about in eighth grade, me and Carlton Ledyard and Bryan Baxter got on our bikes and rode out to one of the flat top mountains to the west of town for no other purpose but to scratch our names onto its sand stone side. I haven’t been back since then, but I know what happens to sand stone over a period of years. I’m sure that the names are still there, but they probably don’t look exactly the same. That’s how sand stone is.

Some people are a lot more into planning than I am, and they have their lives planned down to the dying. They have plans set in stone you might say, but like those names of three friends, their plans have to set in sand stone. Life is full of twists and turns, and each of these is like a pounding rain on their sand stone plans. Tears from life’s letdowns and heartaches and adversities, an even those of joy flow over the plan and change it ever so slightly. Scientifically speaking, with every action there is a reaction. As with every with every move you make in life there is an outcome, some favorable, others not. And with everything that happens, the plan changes ever so slightly. The only thing you can really say is definitely set is that you are going to die. Even then, everything you’ve done to that point is going to affect an even bigger plan.

I’m not saying that you can’t have a plan, because even though I’m not all that good at it, it’s better to know what you want than to just ramble on. The thing is; you have to realize that sometimes the plan has to change, because when making it, you couldn’t see ahead. It doesn’t have to change completely, just ever so slightly, because we can’t stop the weathering effect of life.

Rocks.

I guess I'm just getting old or something...

2006-02-27T00:35:00.000-06:00

So I went to the mall this weekend...needed to get me some new jeans. I've been holding out for a while now. I've got some pants that are still in good shape, but they're a little tight. I thought old Billy might be able to help me get back in 'em.

My main problem was that the "nice" jeans that I wear to work are getting a little old and they get those stupid holes in the back by the pockets. What the hell is it with jeans that they always wear out right there by the inner sides of the back pockets? Its always the first to go! Of course the crotch is the next thing...nothing like going to your job with one of the boys hanging out!

Anyway, my jeans are getting old and I needed a new pair or four. I'm a big enough man to tell you that my mother and stepdad were here this weekend...I'm also a big enough man to tell you that my Mommy bought me a new pair of shoes (which I really needed) and a pair of jeans this weekend. Hey, I'm a big boy, I can fend for myself!

In all reality, I'm very thankful that my Mom came to see me and that she did this for me...she's going to be mad when she reads this...but after she left I went and bought another pair of jeans and 3 pairs of Khaki pants..sorry Mom, but I needed them.

Let's get to the damn point!

So we're looking for a good pair of jeans and they are no where to be found. All you can get are jeans that are pre-stained, pre-ripped, pre-run over, and pre-holed in the damn back pockets. Well hell!!!! I've already got jeans like that, what the hell am I doing out shopping? The problem is that I've got a real job. They don't like me coming to work in jeans that look like I've worn them since 2001 (holy shit, its 2006). I need some whole pants...and they're just not readily available. I'm going to have to start wearing Rustler's (not that there is anything wrong with some big bastard that can whip my ass wearing rustler's) or something like that.

Well, I guess I'm getting old, and not so cool anymore (I think I'm starting to find out that I was never cool in the first place) but I just went to the store and bought me some nice Khaki dress pants. I never thought it would happen...nope....not a chance...but I give up! I refuse to pay 50 bucks for a pair of pants that looks like they spent a week in Acuna (and I do know what that will do to you!) so I'll just look like the guy who's trying to climb the corporate ladder. Next thing you know I'll be shaving on a regular basis (not so fast!!!)

Kids these days and the damn clothes they wear!!!

Working Out...

2006-02-22T23:03:00.000-06:00

So as I sat here looking at the turkey tonight (butterball belly) I started thinking back to a time long ago when I was but a wee lad. I weighed in at about a buck and half some 10 years ago and that was soaking wet. I had the chiseled stomach, and arms, blah, blah, blah f'in...anyway, I wasn't a muscle man. I was a skinny, but in shape guy who played sports and ran around all the time...and then I graduated high school and joined the Midwestern State University all-american skip class to drink team, and its all been pretty much down hill from there. As with any muscle, if you don't use it you'll lose it, and that is what happened.

So this gets me to this blog moment, you see I used to write all the time. At twenty I was writing for my small town newspaper, and had just started experimenting with writing songs, I was writing poetry, and pages among pages of very sad things that I don't want to dwell on (damn women!)

Just like having to get over the embarrassment of doing the Billy Blanks workout, I also had to get over the embarrassment of wanting to write in my small town. Let me take you all back on a little ride.

I was born a poor black child....wrong one

I was born in a very small town in North Texas, in the county Hospital June 6, 1978. Its still a debate today whether I'm lazy, stubborn, or both, but the doctors chose to come in and get me out when they thought it was my time to see the light. I almost killed my mother that day, and
I know I could never say I'm sorry enough, because I haven't made it much easier on her to this day.

I grew up just like every other boy in a small texas town...I was eating ticks at a young age, and was always trying to ride something...whether it be on four legs, or four wheels, and sometimes I didn't care whether I was clothed or not.

I'm not going to sit here and tell you I had a rough childhood...I was warm when it was cold, and cool when it was warm. I never went to bed hungry, and didn't want for much that I really needed. I will just say that I had some challenges, especially in my younger years, and I'm not even talking about the time that I had some weird eye infection and my eyes were crusted shut in the morning when I'd wake up. That was a long time ago, but I remember that vividly.
I can say that I was always a little strange, even though I was one of the popular kids. Of course, I graduated with 36 people, so its hard not to be popular in one way or another. I was one of those crazy guys, that usually does atleast one thing in his young life that people still talk about today...

I got older and did what the older kids in small Texas towns do...I played football, practiced basketball, played baseball and even dabbled in track. The problem was, that I also liked to do what is sometimes looked down upon from the cow punchers or oil field workers that made up the majority of our little town. I liked to write...but it was not something that I just came out and said I liked to do. In my town you had to be tough, you had to drink beer, and you had to hit it with the ladies at a young age...and I'll tell you, I was pretty good at meeting the bar...there are some of these things where I might have even raised some standards among my immediate peers.

I'll break a moment to ask, that if you know anyone, young or old who has a talent, but fears to grow and show it...give them a push...that's all it takes sometimes; just a little positive reinforcement.

So, anyway...stuck in a town where being creative often meant that you were weak...I hid my talents behind Wildcat Football and High School Whoremongering until the phenomenon called Texas Music came along. That's not appropriate, Texas Music has been alive for a long time, and Bob Wills is still the King, but the phenomenon I like to call Robert Earl Keen did come along and all of the sudden it was cool to write as long as you wrote something cool.
So, I used that to my advantage. I wrote things I thought were cool, or thought provoking, or just plain funny for my little paper...I also did sports, and some other little things, but the byline was my main focus there. I also bought a guitar and wrote some horrible songs. I knew maybe 5 chords, and man it was bad. One of my first songs was titled, "I guess I'm unhappy, not being unhappy" now is that a country title or what?

This is getting long eh?

The thing was... the more I wrote...the better I got (imagine that) and the better it flowed, and the better it felt. I was always thinking about something to write...I was always writing about something I'd seen or done. Sometimes it was in song, sometimes it was for the paper, and sometimes it was just for me, but I was always writing and growing my muscle (man, did y'all feel this thing reconnect or what?)

So here I am, got the butter ball hanging out over the keyboard, and banging on these keys...telling a story. Because for some reason lately, I quit using my writing muscle. Its been blocked...I haven't written a new song in quite some time. I've been messed up in the head or something. I had shifted focus to an up and coming band, and some matters of the heart, and had quit using the writing muscle.

Well, its time to start working out again. Myspace has actually been one of the key ingredients to getting me going again. As you can tell, I love to put my words out there, and it gives me one hell off a resource.

So I'm feeling pretty good about things right now. I'm trying to be more healthy, and phsyically fit...but also, I'm trying to get the old creative spirit alive again. Sometime, when I've got some more time, I might go digging through the old Archer County News archive and pull some of my articles out of there. They're entertaining, in one way or another, and I'll try to repost some.

Sometimes the only way to move forward, is to go back a bit.

I'm going to bed...my muscles hurt!

Whispers

2006-02-21T20:54:00.000-06:00

So I originally was going to write today about a good thing...and I still am...but you'll just have to pardon me for the first few paragraphs or so here while I let off some steam.

A few weeks ago I happened onto a story about the Westboro Baptist Church. If you are not familiar with the organization, or cult, or whatever you might want to call them, they are the group that goes around picketing at funerals of fallen soldiers. I won't go too far into their history, I have checked it out on their web page and you can too http://www.godhatesfags.com/ yep, your reading that right. Now I'm not the guy driving the gay bus...that's not my fight at all, but geez.

Anyway, so I saw this story a few weeks ago and it really enraged me. I don't get mad about much...I'm pretty easing going most of the time, but this...this....this really pissed me off. I wanted to just start writing about how wrong these people are...I wanted to tell the world (I live in my own world, I can reach most of me) how wrong this is. The problem being, I'm in no way fit to start a religious debate...I'm just an old drunken heathen...I'm not qualified to tell anyone how right or wrong any of their religious practices are. What I am experienced in, and I'm not asking for pity, is death. I've seen a lot of death in my 27 years. Its not that I wanted to, or was a funeral chaser or anything like that, it just so happened that I've just had quite a few people pass away in my life. Some of those people I was very close with, and the went "before their time" if you believe such a thing. I know how to mourn, or at least how to cope with death...or maybe I don't, but I do know how death makes you feel inside. I also know that if these groups would have showed up to one of those funerals with their hate pickets, I wouldn't have stood by, I wouldn't have held back...something would have been done.

So Angry!!!

Soldiers...Men who died while serving their country. Whether you believe the war that is happening right now to be right or wrong, they did their duty as soldiers. Oh, and this is not about the war in Iraq, or on terrorism, or about oil, or whatever you want to believe that its in...these people picket any fallen soldier. If a soldier were to die protecting the group of picketers from angry family or a fallen soldier, then they would picket that soldier's funeral. Go read the web page, read the insanity, feel the hate that flows from their site.

There is a FAQ section on their site...you can get a lot of info about the madness from this section alone. The following is their answer on why they picket soldier's funerals:

Why do you picket soldiers' funerals?
Here are some axiomatic matters of fact: These turkeys are not heroes. They are lazy, incompetent idiots looking for jobs because they're not qualified for honest work. They were raised on a steady diet of fag propaganda in the home, on TV, in church, in school, in mass media - everywhere - the two-pronged lie: 1) It's OK to be gay; and, 2) Anyone saying otherwise, like WBC, is a hatemonger who must be vilified, demonized, marginalized into silence. Therefore, with full knowledge of what they were doing, they voluntarily joined a fag-infested army to fight for a fag-run country now utterly and finally forsaken by God who Himself is fighting against that country.

They turned America Over to fags; They're coming home In body bags.

Are you mad yet?

Imagine a wife and mother and the children that are at home alone, wondering when or if they will ever see their man again. Imagine the feeling that runs down their spine and back up into their stomach when they hear the news that their soldier didn't make it. Imagine the loss and despair, imagine the pain and the memories, and now imagine trying to lay that loved one to rest with an angry mob of irreverent ass holes (it had to be said) chanting that God killed your fag soldier. Imagine a hurting mother having to explain why these animals are calling daddy a Faggot. The Westboro folk say that they do not teach hate, but rather teach truth. Which does seem funny if you read one of their featured articles : http://www.godhatesfags.com/fliers/feb2006/20060220_ten-american-military-idiots.pdf

If you don't' want to read it, here's the headline: WBC to picket funerals of ten American Military idiots killed last Friday

This is where the good comes in. I was reading through the headlines today (gotta love headlines) and I came upon the story of some bikers called the Patriot Guard Riders. They ride to the funerals of fallen heroes, but only the ones they are asked to attend, and position themselves between the hatemongers and those who are mourning. Some of these dudes are pretty scary looking, but they are not there intimidate the opposition, rather they are there to support a family who has lost a loved one. You can read more about these guys at:

www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1546831/posts or www.patriotguard.org

Then it makes you feel good again. It feels good that someone is stepping up and taking on the extremist. It makes me feel good to know that someone has enough respect for these families, enough love in their hearts to go out of their way to try to let a horrible horrible day be a little less painful. It makes me want to buy a Harley and hit the road. These guys have a link on their web page where you can get more info and also one where you can give a tax deductible donation. I'm not telling or even asking you to give them money, but I get paid at midnight on Thursday (direct deposit, tmi???) and Friday Morning I'm going to give them some of mine.

Somebody say something...everybody say something!!!

For so long now it seemed that the only people speaking up, were the ones opposing all things American. Rallies and rants about taking prayer out of public schools and its functions, about honoring the religious habits of muslims and other religions or those who choose no religion at the cost of the one that this country was founded upon, about changing the pledge of allegiance, about taking the commandments off courthouse lawns, about taking the Christ out of Christmas and I've wondered if anyone of the good guys was ever going to say, "enough is enough".

So here I am. An uneducated, non-practicing Christian alcoholic (I'm a balls to the wall sinner folks!!!) I have no standing within my community, I will never run for office (although maybe I should with these credentials), people don't look up to me...basically I'm not much...but I'm saying that enough is enough. It's a mere whisper...all I need is another whisper...and another...and another and then all of a sudden we are saying something and it can be heard.

I'm not asking for you to change, I'm asking that you quit trying to change me.

I'm glad to be a Texan, and thankful that I live in these United States, but some things need fixing. Maybe I'll move to Australia...those guys have got some balls when it comes to their country and how it will be run.

Oh yeah, and tonight when you say your prayers...say a little prayer for the Texas WettNex...may they get what God has in store for them!

Hear the music... www.myspace.com/thetexaswettnex